You see, there is this *thing* that haunts my husband. It's called a *stalker*. It was a friend's sister who constantly hounded him whenever they got together. It's cool, I've been there. I used to have a crush on my best friend's older brother. For years, I secretly harbored a crush on him but was too shy to ever say anything. Plus my friend hated him (like siblings do) so it was a taboo subject. The truth finally came out a few years ago, but that was *after* I had met hubby.
See, the thing is, I grew out of it. It was a crush.
But this girl hasn't yet. And its especially annoying when she has her own boyfriend (who was sitting right next to her the whole night) and she is constantly trying to get hubby's attention so she can yammer on about something irrelevant to the current conversation. And she tried to tell me how great her boyfriend is, but she never talks to him.
When she noticed that he wasn't responding to her calls for attention, she turned on me and tried to get me to be mean to him. To slap his chest and poke and prod him while he was roasting a marshmallow, to throw things at him.
I put a stop to it by very calmly saying "No I'm not mean like that"
Then she tried to invite herself over, saying I should make her some lasagna (it's famous, what can I say?) and I said that I'd think about it.
Normally it would boil my blood that she was there, but I have learned to deal with things that are on the unpleasant side. Sure she may be annoying and hounding my man, but you know what? He's still coming home with me tonight. I am still married to the best man in the world. Nothing will change that. I know its a crush and nothing more. I used to get so angry and jealous, but I know now the greatest insult you can unleash on someone is to ignore them. And it felt good. But not holier-than-thou but more like, I could enjoy my friends without having to worry about what she would do or say. I even had a conversation with her for a few moments before talking to someone else. It was casual .
After we went home, hubby said he was very proud of how I handled it.
I think she just has a lot of growing up to do.
Wow...she should have left with a flaming marshmallow embedded up her pooper.
ReplyDeleteYou are so zen!
You dealt with that really well. I'm a nice person, and it takes alot before I turn into an uber bi^ch, but when my husband and I were engaged, he ran into an ex-girlfriend, who then started stalking him, and trying to get him to kiss her, and break things off with me.
ReplyDeleteLuckily he's a great guy, who was practically traumatized by his relationship with her, and he wouldn't take anything from her. It ended up being an email conversation (battle) she and I had, after I told her we were getting married and to leave my man alone. She never did give up, but then she passed away, so while I'm glad she's not bothering us anymore, I am sad she went the way she did.