Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Sleeping Beauty

Yesterday, Drake was really cranky. 2pm rolled around and he usually takes a nap anywhere from 2-3 for about an hour or two and it was so hot, he couldn't fall asleep. Cue crabbing for 4 hours. He mostly just gurgled and half heartedly cried his displeasure at not being able to fall asleep, but at 6 pm he hit full out meltdown mode.

He cried and cried and then fell asleep. Probably from exhaustion. Then he slept only in his diaper until this morning at 6 am. I kept checking on him periodically to see if he was cold but he never was. Today it was a lot cooler so he was getting chilly this morning. After I dressed him (he woke up) I just sort of left him in his crib. I didn't talk to him or look at him while dressing him and I patted his butt a few times then left.

He fell back asleep and then woke up at 10:30!! So both me and Brian got fantastic sleep! We went to bed at 2:30 so we both got 8 hours. That hasn't happened in a long time. (Unless, you know, we had my parents look after him)

He then hung out for about an hour and a half in his swing. Then he wanted a nap. So he is now sleeping again.

I understand that he is sleepy, the weekends wear him out, but I am thinking it might be another growth spurt. Simply because he's been learning so much lately, I think he is worn out.

He's learning to blow raspberries
Stand on hands and knees
Mimic what we do
Hold his bottle

That's a lot for a little guy to go through at once.

Saturday, May 26, 2012

Shark Week, hoo-ha-haa

Cyndi over at Run Roll Repeat  calls her lady time "shark week" and I agree this is an apt description.

Anyway, I thought I was losing my mucking find and my pills weren't working any more it turns out it's just lady time and I'm psycho now because I have given birth. PMS seems to change when you have children. Now I can expect to be bat shit crazy once a month! Like I need that mess.

Here is how I figured it out:

I texted my mom that I was sad some internet troll discovered from my loud, annoying laugh that I am a fattie. I am not sure if it's because it was true that it hurt my feelings or what, because I know I am fat, I know I have a loud annoying laugh, and this isn't even the worst troll comment I've ever gotten. I was called a cunt and a stupid bitch just the week before- and I laughed in my loud, annoying laugh at those. So WTF pms.

Insanity moment #2:

I cried when Boromir died. Yes, Boromir, Son of Gondor... from Lord of the Rings.

Heaven forbid I cry over something useful.

Third time's the charm:

I cried over the dead roses on my counter top. Not because the flowers were dead, but because I had to throw them away.

I know. I'm looking for my Xanax. I can't seem to find it.

I'm about to go off the deep end and just order a cinna pie from one of the pizza joints around here and tell them to just hold the pie and give me all the hot jizzy frosting because that is all I am going to eat out of it anyway.

It's hot cum is what it is. Cinnabon, anyone?

Hello Murphy

You know that saying, whatever can go wrong, will? Well Brian got a flat tire. Some how he got a nail in the tire. Luckily it can be saved, we can plug it for $10 but this time of the month is always crunch time, we are trying to make sure we have enough for rent and any extra money needing to be spent is never looked at with friendly eyes. Glare glare... but hey, it's alright.

Just a day in the life.

Sweet baby Drake is back to his normal sleeping schedule and I think he is back to himself. He is definitely less cranky lately. I want to say that he is done teething, but really he's just begun. Once they get one, you know it's going to be just a matter of time before they get the rest of them! haha

Okay, one last "complaint" it's very hot in our apartment. Living on the third floor tends to do that to you though. The best way to keep the apartment cool though, I learned, is to make sure the blinds are closed from 10-2 and that the doors to all the individual rooms are shut. it takes less time and energy to keep those rooms cool if its a smaller square footage. I also brought out the fan from the baby's room and I put it on high so it keeps the air circulating. It keeps things cooler than usual but still there is no getting away from it, it is h-o-t hot!

It's going to be a long summer.

Anyway, Drake is going to my parent's today for his weekly visit and I have a lot of work that I have to do today so I am going to go enjoy my small break while I can.

Thursday, May 24, 2012

Comfortably Numb

The teething continues on here. For the most part, (and other moms are readying their pitchforks at this) it's been pretty easy. Now that I know what he is getting fussy about, it's easy to fix. His tooth has pushed all the way through the gum line in 3 days, so this seems a short process...

An anecdote for you:

Sunday we took baby Drake over to my parents for the day. Except I forgot his diaper bag. I had filled it with diapers, wipes, formula, you know the usual things... oh, and his baby orajel for his tooth. So I was thinking I was SOL but we ran down to Wal-Mart to pick up the bare essentials. And more baby Orajel. Teething moms know, ORAJEL IS ESSENTIAL at this stage.

Here is the interesting part: we forgot to put Max in his crate. He's a very good dog usually, but he has been known to have his .... issues when we leave him left out. The couch took a beating. My clothes took a beating. But we weren't going to be gone long...

We come home and I can't find the orajel ANYWHERE. I bought 2 tubes at Wal-Mart, plus the one we already had. I had no idea where any of them went.

Max got into it. Apparently, cherry flavor means "gotta eat it all" in dog language. Let's just say that by the time the sensation's worn off in his mouth, it will have made its way to his other end... I wasn't sure if he would get sick from it, but he turned out okay.

Drake simultaneously laughs and cries when he sees the orajel. He loves how it makes his mouth feel but hates the taste of it. I laugh every time because if I don't, I'll cry too. He has no interest in frozen washcloths or water-filled teething toys. He does like this bug one, so that is good. Mostly he just chomps on his fingers and then cries it hurts. I keep explaining to him that "fingers aren't toys" but he is still trying to figure that one out.

He actually bit (or scratched? not sure which) his lip and it bled and bled and he had blood all over his face and clothes and Brian was all OMG WHAT HAPPENED and I kept my cool.

Brian keeps asking me all these questions. "What age do all their teeth come in?" and "when does such and such happen?" I don't have the answers. I tell him to go look it up, and he replied with "you're a mom, aren't you supposed to know everything?" hah, zing. "I do not know everything, but I know one thing: How to use GOOGLE!" So ha! Take that.

Brian's been treating me extra special lately. I got my engagement ring cleaned and inspected at the store. He's been letting me get much needed sleep. He goes on walks with me. He does things without me asking (like dishes!) I cannot get over how much more helpful and sweet he is being to me. I really am very lucky. I told him just the other day that I was really feeling a little undervalued because he didn't get me anything for Mother's Day or our anniversary, and how much that really upset me that he didn't do that or anything even slightly romantic, so he responded with flowers, cards, and dishes. :)

Father's Day is coming up and I am trying to think of what to get him "from Drake" to make his first one special. Brian's birthday is coming up too, so I gotta figure out what I will get him for that, too. So much to do, so little time. I really to make it special. I've got some ideas in my head but the most challenging part (as always) is to somehow procure the items without him knowing. It sucks that I can't drive.

Anyway, if you have any cool ideas for a geeky gadget sort of Dad and gift ideas (that aren't super expensive) let me know.

Friday, May 18, 2012

Push On Through

...to the other side!

Poor baby is teething! It's so funny as yesterday, he was chewing on my finger and his gums felt level and fine. Today, his tooth is actually erupting through the gum line, and it's already started crowning. I can feel the ridges in the tooth, and more importantly, can see them.

I stocked up on baby orajel.

Good thing too, because although he hates it when I put it on, he is SUPER happy when it starts working. He goes from cranky to happy instantly. I'll be so sad when it quits working.

I can't help but be a happy mama... I mean, I know I should feel bad he is not feeling his best and in pain, but I am just so proud of my little man, he's growing up too fast.

I'm going to go sob about the good ol' days when he was just a wee babe.

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

A day in the life

I'm hungry
I'm tired
I'm wet
Wipe me
Put more cream on
That's too much cream
Wipe my face
Eww stop wiping my face
Pick me up
Put me down
I threw up!
Clean me up!
I don't feel good.
I'm hungry again
I threw up again
I'm hungry
No not really
I want this toy
Now I want that toy
Pick me up
I'm tired of being on my tummy
I don't want to be on my back
I'm tired
I said I'm not sleepy!
Stop trying to make me sleep!
Why'd you let me fall asleep!
Who are you?
Where's the other one!
I don't like you
Stop trying to make me laugh
I don't want to put on my pajamas
Where are we going
I don't want to go here
The light is too bright
I don't want to wear my hat
Why'd you put me back here
What's going on now
What's this show about
I don't like this toy
The dog makes me laugh
Why'd you tell the dog to go away
I like his kisses
Stop kissing me
I want to eat again
I don't like pears
Stop taking my pants off
I don't need to be changed again
I pooped. Change me
I need more butt cream
That wipe is too cold
That washcloth is too warm
I don't want to wear clothes
I'm hot
I'm cold
Where's my rattle
Have you seen Dad?
Where did you go?
I don't like my swing
Can I sit up
I need a nap
I don't want to sleep
I said I'm TIRED
I love you.

Hours of endless amusement. I love you too, Drake.

Tuesday, May 15, 2012


Drake has decided now that every time he is even remotely tired, he is going to scream bloody murder until he falls asleep... which could be any minute or three hours from now.

This really tries my patience because it brings me back to those first few weeks and the post partum blues that went along with it. So far, I haven't broken down and sobbed uncontrollably, but I've gotten close.

Then he falls asleep, and I'm all "aww what a little angel he is". He sleeps for 15 minutes then bitches he is awake again. Sigh.

He also has night terrors. Except that's not really an accurate statement. An accurate statement would be "sleep terrors" because he screams bloody murder every time he is sleeping... whether or not its at night. It's this horrible, gut-wrenching sob that makes my very heart break... and you can't wake him up! He doesn't wake up or respond to any soothing techniques. You just have to wait for it to pass. The soothing techniques (holding him and patting him) are really only to soothe me and Brian because it freaks us out and we get frazzled.

Turns out we both suffered from them as kids so go figure, it's hereditary, apparently.

Today is our anniversary. We've been married 3 short years. Seriously, where does the time go? Brian bought me a lovely card and a dozen red roses. The card made me cry. He confessed it got him really choked up too.

I very rarely get flowers, and while I know that they will die in just a few short days, I really do love them. I wish my house was always full of fresh flowers... but then I'd have to water them.

We are going to go out and get each other's gifts probably on Thursday, his day off. I'm allowed anything I want and for some reason, all I can think of is clothes. He can't decide on what he wants either so I am not sure what we are going to end up doing. It should be a fun day.

We are also having his parents over on Thursday for a belated Mother's Day present for his mom. I have to figure out what to get her. She is hard to buy for because I have no idea what her hobbies are. I will just wing it I suppose. I thought of cooking something for her but I have no idea what she would like to eat. She has mentioned my lasagna a fair few times over the last few years, so maybe I'll make that.

Today I did two loads of laundry and picked up the living room. I also didn't get dressed. I need a shower desperately but I haven't been feeling the greatest so I slept all day when Brian was home so I could function after he left. I managed, but that is about it. I work all night too, so I will somehow have to squeeze a shower in between sleeping and the baby waking up.

I have been doing my best to get dressed every day and do hair and make up because that is what you have to force yourself to do when you are home all day and it really does keep your sanity. Here is a picture of me, its been far too long since I posted one. (Note: If you follow me on Facebook, this is probably old hat. Sorry.)

I'd say that I am actually more willing to take a photo of myself these days, just far too lazy to upload any :)

I'm working out a list of rewards I want for myself when I lose 5, 10, 15 lbs you know, that way I can keep myself motivated. I am not really going to post about the day to day things with weight loss over here any more, I have a WW blog that I am using for that. I will continue to post my losses/gains (hopefully more losses than gains) on here so I can keep you all updated, but I want this to be more of a family/general life blog now than just a healthy /ww blog.

One of the biggest things I want/need are new glasses or contacts. I am thinking of going the contact route again because I feel prettier in contacts than in glasses. I love my glasses, but I'd like the option of wearing them, not the requirement.

When we get rid of our credit card debt, Brian said that I could get Lasik surgery if I really wanted it. I do, and I'm sure I'll be scared but I think it would be worth it. Right now, I am doing all I can to make sure that we are throwing our extra money at more credit card payments.

Anyway, enough rambling on for now, I'm sure I'll post again tomorrow.


Lately I have just been feeling so overwhelmed. I think it is because of all the changes happening lately.

Brian getting a new job
I've been working at least 6 hours a day, 7 days a week for the last three weeks. This weekend was my first "real" day off in 3 weeks.
I've been watching my weight watchers like a hawk and doing the best that I can to track everything honestly and be as accurate as possible
Making time for friends
Making time for exercising
Making time for cleaning and re-organizing
Making sure that I am taking care of me first. Doing my hair/makeup/getting dressed and showering regularly since fighting depression requires this.

I did do something really nice for myself and I have been doing it every day and that is rubbing myself with this lovely Japanese Cherry Blossom body butter from Bath & Body works. My uncle's girlfriend (pseudo-aunt) got us this lovely sampler pack for Christmas for my mom, my grandma, and me. I can't remember the fragrance my mom got, but my grandma got Moonlit Path, which is my absolute favorite, so I took the JCB and it is heavenly. I slather it on my feet and hands daily and I have really noticed a difference. I also have been putting on cocoa butter over my stomach for the stretch marks and c-section incision and it is looking lots better as well. I feel like I'm the softest I've been in a long time.

Sunday I had a horrible hang over, I had 3 beers, 2 mixed drinks, and 3 shots, which is way more than I have had in a long long time, so I was feelin' the hurt. Happy Mother's Day, here's your aspirin and water. Get me my face mask. Mummy's got a hang over.

I've discovered the one thing I hate about parenthood: Laundry. The laundry never ends. It's now worse than I ever imagined. I have a limited amount of clothing that actually fits me from being pregnant and fat for so long, so I run through clothes quickly.

No clothes + baby vomit = laundry.

Brian likes to have clean clothes for work.

Work clothes + baby vomit = laundry.

Drake throws up on himself.

Baby clothes + baby vomit = laundry.

I finally broke down and bought myself some nice smelling laundry detergent and some liquid fabric softener. Might as well have nice soft wonderful smelling clothes if I am going to be slaving away at the laundry piles all day long. Seriously, I need a rake to get through it all.

One thing that has helped me keep my sanity though is my dear friend Carissa. I love her to pieces, she is probably my best friend since moving to the city. I just get along with her so well. She is so beautiful too, she really inspires me to keep on track and keep going to Zumba and keep trying. I may not ever look exactly like her or be her size, but she reminds me that I can be beautiful once again. I know my beautiful sexy hot body is hiding somewhere in this flub. I just need to keep on keepin' on.It's been so refreshing to hang out with her and to go to Zumba with her and just be around her. I feel like I was really missing out on being with out friends for so long.

I feel happier knowing that I have someone I can talk to that I am not related to any more haha :)

Friday, May 4, 2012

Happy Four Months!

Drake is 4 months old tomorrow. Wow, what a rush. Time flew by soo quickly.

Today we started him on solids. And by "solids" I really mean just baby food. He gets a "snack" or a little bit of a supplement to one of his bottles a day, and so far, so good. We tried pears today and he was grabbing the spoon and stuffing it all in his mouth. He had about a third of an ounce and then 6 ounces of formula after. He's so funny. He was taking the food off of the spoon and shoving his whole fist in his mouth and eating it off his fingers. Watching him figure out how to swallow something thicker than milk is hilarious! he just seems so confused and awkward. I couldn't help but laugh.

I lost over 700 pictures and videos when I sold my iPad. I had backed them up on the computer- or so I thought- but I guess it didn't back them all up. Sigh. Now they are in digital heaven, where all the little bits and bytes go when you reformat things.

Brian started a new job. He was getting tired of driving for pizza delivery and no matter how many times he asked his manager for more hours, he was actually getting less hours. Luckily he got in at a great place so now I don't have to worry about him getting in a car accident or driving in shitty weather just for a few dollars.

Brian's been doing commission work, so if you need anything done don't hesitate to ask! Whether it's a new blog background, wedding invites, or even a twitter avatar/background, caricatures, you know... whatever you fancy! Just shoot him off an e-mail.

Anyway I really haven't got much to say I'm afraid, that's just what's been happening the last few days. Hope everyone has a nice weekend.