Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Daily Goals!

Today started cleaning up my bedroom. Hubby is charge of everything that is not clothes related.. and Im in charge of laundry.

Hard work.

Got my fancy watch in the mail today, its really nice. Love it so far.
It's purple.

Yesterday I took my mom's dog, Goober, out for a walk. He had already been on one so it was much easier to control him and tell him what to do/not to do. We even let a neighborhood kid pet him. Exciting! I didn't do a load of laundry however, I did do a load of dishes and even wash some by hand, so I consider it equal.

Today's daily goal....sleep. I have been so incredibly tired the last couple of days, I can barely function.

However I have company coming over in a few hours and that requires more cleaning and scrubbing and then making enchiladas with spanish rice. Yay... I love cooking, I really do. But today I am just not into it. Hubby asked if we could order pizza, but as you recall, my weekly goal is to not eat out this week... I dont know what to do I mean, I will most definitely make enchiladas like a good housewife. My husband told me to, so therefore... I have to :)

At least he keeps me honest. He keeps me strong when I waver, and he carries me when I fall.

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Did I just do that??

I spent a lot of time yesterday reading my Jillian Michaels' book. It was really inspirational.
I also found out that I am right on track with how many calories I should be consuming a day if I want to lose 2lbs a week.

Yesterday I found out that I do have more resolve and determination than I previously thought possible. I did the entire 30 Day Shred workout. I even did pushups, crunches, squats and presses, chest flys...

The only modification though, was I rode my stationary bike, Stella, for the cardio portion of the workout. I cannot physically do jumping jacks (I tried, nearly sprained my ankle) or anything of the sort, has to be low impact. I know that some people think I am exaggerating that I cannot run, stand on my feet for long periods of time, do jumping jacks or jump rope, any sort of jumping... but honestly, I am not capable of it. I don't like to do it either. I would if it didn't result in pain and eventual trips to my doctor and inevitable surgeries. But no. I am not pushing myself where I know I have a known weakness. I can still get a great cardio workout without running. The elliptical is a great example. Stella is too. I can even go on walks.

It was really hard to power through the work out at moments, especially when we were doing arm exercises. My shoulders are so sore. But I did everything on there to the best of my ability. I couldn't do the last set of push ups, I actually collapsed. The fact I even did 10 the first time was amazing to me.

I took a sneaky peek at the scale today... Yesterday I was at 222.6 much to my dismay but today.... 221.

Secret yay! Let's keep this trend moving, shall we?

Daily goals:
  • Take a walk today.
  • Do a load of laundry
Daily Rewards:
  • Take a nap
  • Sing off key.
See you all tomorrow

Monday, March 29, 2010

Winning at Losing

Went to Barnes and Noble today picked up Jillian Michaels' "Winning at Losing" book.
I had to buy it because, firstly, it's about empowering yourself and this is a battle we all struggle with, me especially.

The first few pages talk about commitment. If you can't commit to yourself and a positive life change then this book isn't for you. If you are looking for a quick fix, this book isn't for you. If you aren't willing to put in blood, sweat and tears... well come back when you are. Strong words.

The first exercise is on creating a goal list. Not just any goal list. An ultimate goal list with rewards. Complete with Daily, Weekly, Monthly and Long term goals.

I actually wrote mine down in a notebook, but I'll share it with you.

Long term Goal

  • To lose 100 pounds
Long term Reward
  • Bahamas!
  • Bikinis
  • Shopping spree
Monthly Goal (April)
  • I will lose 6 lbs this month
  • I will add in my veggies
  • I will try one new fruit
  • I will do the entire Level 1 of 30 Day Shred without quitting.
Monthly Reward (April)
  • I will put $10 in a jar for every pound and inch lost this month.
  • I will get a manicure
  • I will buy new makeup
Weekly Goals (Mar 29-Apr 4)
  • I will do 30 Day Shred three times this week
  • I will lose 1.5 lbs this week.
  • I will not eat out this week.
Weekly Rewards
  • I will get new music for my iPhone.
  • I will crochet one hour a day.
  • I will read for 3 hours this week.
Daily Goal
  • 30 Day Shred
  • Make dinner at home.
Daily Reward
  • Take a long shower and use my favorite body lotion :)
Every day I will make a new daily goal, and make sure I work towards my weekly goals as well.

Then there were some self-talk questions. I had fun answering these, even if it was hard.

1. Do you have a negative self-image?

Yes, often I feel as though I am not "good enough" or I don't deserve what I have (ie my husband, not sure how I got so lucky) I am lazy, I am loud, annoying, and a bitch. I don't know what to say to others and I often feel like I have put my foot in my mouth or that I offend others. I don't feel like I belong. And I am fat.

2. Do you lack self confidence?
Yes. To be honest I have been very delusional. But I think it also helps because I believe it. It honestly depends on the day. The hour. The minute.

3. Do you feel powerless?
I wouldnt say powerless, but I am afraid. I am afraid of failing. I am afraid that I can't do anything that I put my mind to because I don't have the motivation. I am afraid that I fail others. I am afraid of pity.

4. Do you label yourself in negative ways?
Yes I often refer to myself as a Beluga Whale. A) I like the word beluga and 2) I know I am fat and I don't want others to say it first.

5. How is negativity serving/helping you?
It isn't. It reminds me that I know I am fat, and I don't want anyone to think that I am pretentious.

Ouch. Now you have to ask the same questions but answer them positively. This was a bit more difficult for me.

1. Do you have a negative self-image?
No. I realize that I will never be perfect or live up to unrealistic standards. All my flaws and each one of my extra pounds is part of who I am and it does not inhibit me. I will embrace them because it makes me unique.

2. Do you lack self confidence?
No. I ooze it out of every pore. I have a college degree, married the most loving, wonderful husband and I have an amazingly supportive family.

3. Do you feel powerless?
No. In a few short weeks I have changed my body. In 4 Weeks I have lost 13" total. I am capable and able to do anything that I set my mind to.

4. How do you label yourself?
Geek. Housewife. Obsessive blogger. Cook. Lucky.

5. How is this positivity serving you?
Fantastically. It makes me realize everything I have going for me and that I can accomplish anything I set my mind to.

And that was just the first four chapters. I was in tears at the bookstore reading this. I knew I had found something worthwhile. I will do what I want. I will lose 100 lbs. I will go to the Bahamas. I will not make excuses.

Judgment Day

Its weigh in day. Let's just say the results are expected.
In a week I was doing so good, I was -2 lbs, but then I gained a whopping 2.6 back! UGH how is it in 5 days I can lose 2 lbs but then in 2 days I gain almost 3?! So unfair.

Anyway... My fancy scale stats don't lie.

My body fat percentage is up .2% since last week, water hydration is down by .9% and then of course, I went from 220 to 222.6


My BMI went from 37.1 to 37.2. Siiiiigh.

Well at least now I know.

However, speck of hope, ray of light, silver lining to this awful thunderstorm...

My measurements are down once again!

Chest 42 down 1"
Waist 42 no change
Hips 48.5 down .5"
Arm 13.5 down 1.5"
Thigh 26.5 down .5"
Calf 16.5 down .5"

YAY Woohoo! I have lost a total of 4" this week! And the numbers that weren't moving, are finally starting to! YAY!!!!

The only trouble is my bust and my waist are the same measurement again, effectively making me pearshaped. Blah. I did the 30 Day Shred again last night, only managed to do half the workout in the creepy fitness center. (It was dark, there was loud music, it was empty, and the mirrors... they made me shudder...)

I can't do jumping jacks. I thought maybe I could with the right kind of supportive shoe and mental attitude but I can't. Physically at least. Not because I get out of breath and my tits hit me in the face, but because my ankle started sending sharp shooting pains through my body. Today, it hurts. Bad.

But my thighs and arms feel good. A good ache. So I must be getting better at squats and presses. I think I will do the DVD still, and instead of running in place, butt kicks, or jumping jacks, I'll spin on Stella for as fast as I can. I thought I was past all the ankle limitations but once again, have deluded myself. I will try my hardest though to not let it stop me. It serves as a good reminder that I am limited, yes I have special needs for the moment, but no, it won't stop me. I can do loads of low impact things. Stella, you and me, date night. Should I bring the bike flowers if I lose 20lbs? Hmm...

So what did we learn this week?

1. I am not invincible. I will gain weight. FAST.
2. I have to work hard to achieve my results.
3. My ankle is a limitation, but not one I can't overcome.
4. If you document success as well as failure, then really, you succeed. (Thanks for that one Lisa, its so true!)

I lost 4" off my body, most of them in trouble zones. I think its the Shred, honestly. As its the only thing I did differently. 4" in 2 days?! I'm so giddy!

Despite drinking almost 2 extra bottles of water a day, I am still waaaay out side the range of hydration for my age and height, I need to be at 50% instead I'm 41%

I tried to upload a pic of my measurements but it's not loading... Anyway, I have lost a whopping 13" off my body in a month. WOW! 7 of that is from my waist, my most desired place to lose some inches. I cannot express how happy I am right now. I may not have lost a lot of weight this month or even since I started my journey, but I have lost a lot of inches. And that's really what matters. I have to keep reminding myself that I will not be a 200+ woman with a 38-34-38 hourglass figure. That's what I am shooting for, though I could easily be smaller than that when it's all said and done.

The weight will come off. I like the inches shedding off though. Very pleased. Also in 5 short posts I will be at my 200th blog! YAY gotta think of something special for that, I already have a few ideas, but going to keep them under my hat for now.

Goals for the week

Complete the entire modified 30 Day Shred Level 1 workout.
Do some more push ups on Bouncy Ball.
Wii Fit for 15 Minutes.
Walk 2x this week, for an hour each.

Sunday, March 28, 2010


Okay... I admit it. I binged this weekend. I went on a bender. It was like I tried as hard as I could to undo all of my hard work in the shortest amount of time possible.

I know everyone falls off the wagon and its just a matter of stopping, thinking, planning and then getting back up and running again.

So to help myself realize what a fat pig I can be, I decided to document everything that I had eaten, that I can remember.

I didnt track anything. Im sure I ate well over 2500 calories each of the last two days.

Yesterday I had half a home made bbq chicken pizza. I got a pillsbury classic crust, some bbq sauce, a 6 oz package of grilled chicken strips and half a bag of shredded cheddar cheese.
Then... we went to the movies. I had a bag of peanut butter m&ms, it was 230 calories for a serving, and there were 3.5 servings in the bag. I ate the whole thing.
I also had a large cherry coke.
I had a special dark hershey bar 180 calories
Then I had arby's. A chicken bacon and swiss. Fried. Then we shared a large mozzerella stick, which was 3 each.
I also had some yogurt.

Friday I was craving pizza. Specifically BBQ chicken. I almost ordered take out but listening to my mom, I didn't. I can't remember what I ate.
I know that I ate half a box of mac and cheese which was about 700 calories. I grilled a chicken breast in a honey mustard marinade. Oh. I also ate a corndog.

Anything else was just gluttony, as I was well over my calories for the day.

In two days, I gained back 2 lbs. I was so close to being under 220 for the first time in over a year and I got cocky. Sloppy. Fat.
I thought because I was so sore from doing 30 day shred one day, that it was okay.

Its not okay. It's not even fun. I had heartburn for the first time in months. I didnt feel good at all. I had digestive problems. My cat actually pawed open the bathroom door, took one whiff, made a sound like he was gagging, and then left.

I also hurt my wrist the other day, lugging my fat ass around, I ended up straining it. So I had to ice my thighs and my wrist. Sigh.

But today I did some push ups on my stability ball. I had to push it against a wall so I wouldnt fall off it. Then I downloaded 30 Day Shred from iTunes and loaded it on to my iPhone, I am going to go to the fitness center tonight and listen to it while I work out. I need to push myself harder, and make myself do things I dont find exceptionally pleasant.

A quote from Ms Jillian: "If you want your body to change, then you have to put stress on it." Yes its hard. Yes it sucks. But I used to do this all the time. I just forgot what its like. Maybe I can reverse some of this damage before tomorrow's weigh in. But if not, it's okay. I'm allowed setbacks, slipups and slides, as long as I get back up.

I'm a fighter. I will not give up. I want sundresses not muu muu's.
Who's with me?

Friday, March 26, 2010

3 2 1....

I just got cable last week.
Since then I have been addicted to shows like Operation Repo, Good Eats, Animal Cops, etc.

I also get "On Demand" and I finally checked it out last night. I get some free exercise shows too! One of them... Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred.

The sample workout they give is called 3 2 1. Its three minutes of strength, two minutes of cardio, one minute of ab work. Rinse and repeat 4 times.

I did 21 of the 28 minutes, mostly because it was late at night and if my exercise bike annoys my neighbors I am sure my jumping jacks will. You know because it sounds like a whale is flopping around in my apartment.

Anyways, it was a tough workout, even sans jumping jacks. I actually did push ups! Sure I did the modified version but even that was tough. I also did squats with presses and I have to say DA-YAMN my thighs hurt. It was tough to push myself, but it was fun also.

If you do it every day, you can lose up to 5 lbs in a week! How exciting. Though I don't expect that kind of progress, it is still fun. If I can make it through all the exercise in a week, then I might buy the whole dvd. Actually there is a deal going on now at where you can get all three of her work out DVDs (30 day Shred; Banish Fat, Boost Metabolism; and No More Trouble Zones) for 30.00
Buy them here

The full effects of the 30 Day Shred boast you can lose 20 lbs in 30 days. That would be awesome.

I hope that I am able to erm... walk tomorrow. LOL I am very sore today, its the most intense workout I've gotten in 20 minutes. My arms hurt, my legs hurt, my abs hurt. All good signs. I don't get this kind of burn on Stella.

Thursday, March 25, 2010

mmm fried... goodies....

Yesterday was a very dangerous day.
Diet wise.

I went to visit me mam and pappy! Hubby had a boys night.

Gramma wanted to go see Alice in Wonderland, so I tagged along.
We got a jumbo extra large popcorn and covered it--nay--drowned it in melted butter sauce stuff then dumped a mountain of salt on it. Light shake to stir.
Triple bucket size soda. I got a Cherry Coke. Not a diet cherry.

I scarfed the entire top third of the bucket. Gramma had two handfuls. LOL
I downed my drink.

then I went back to Ma's. Make dinner she said. We will have pork chops!
I decide, for whatever reason, to fry them and then bake them in a barbecue sauce. I made mac and cheese and tiny biscuits too.

I ate one chop, a spoonful of mac, and a biscuit. I gave the other to the dog. Anyway. I am sure I ate WELL over my allotted calories for the day. I didn't even try and track that. I wasn't sure how much popcorn I ate. 15 thousand handfuls? I don't know how many calories are in a fried bbq pork chop. I lie, it was actually pork LOIN sliced into chops, which means, it was MUCH much better than a silly old chop.

Its no surprise really then, that today I am sick to my stomach. I have been spending lots of quality time alone in the bathroom. I also hopped on the scale this morning and noticed I had gained .5 lb! GAINED! In one day! I GAINED! UGHHHHH

Today, back on program. I had Hamburger Helper today. 2 servings. 620 calories. A yoplait yogurt. 110 calories.

Its 8 pm and I still have about half my calories.

I watched Biggest Loser with my mom. Well, sort of. We sit there and chat on msn while its on lol.
I was so surprised that the first day they were at the ranch they did 26.2 miles on a bike. at 500 lbs. TWENTY SIX POINT TWO miles their FIRST DAY! I was bragging about my 4.5 LOL

This sort of opened my eyes. If those pudge buckets can ride 26.2 miles their first day at fat camp, then I should be able to, too. Right? Right. I weigh less than they did. Why shouldnt I be able to?

Also: Lance's wife is a vindictive bitch. Making him eat those cupcakes. WTF? Where's the support? Im glad he lost. What goes around, comes around. Your greedy ass wife got you booted from the show. LOL

I'm wondering if I am not exercising enough? I mean... I am not losing lots of pounds really, but inches. Could it be that I am not pushing myself hard enough? Most likely. I think I am afraid to push myself because the next time, the bar is set that much higher and I secretly worry I will fail. That I can't push it up again.

This attitude has to stop because it's not helping me any. If I am afraid to push the bar then where does that leave me? Fat.

Let's stop making excuses Christie. Let's starting making changes. If they can do it, I can do it. If they can't do it, fuck it, I'm doing it anyway and bragging all about it.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Bragging Rights

Yes I am wonderful! I am down 16.5 lbs!

I even slipped on my wedding dress and it fits beautifully now. It's actually a sun dress, so I can wear it as much as I want and not look like a weirdo. Anyway, I am so happy.

Monday, March 22, 2010

What I am Thankful for

I had been making my blog rounds and I am seeing that weight loss and progress seems to be slowing for a lot of my blog friends.

I thought right now, that I would make a list of things I am thankful for. It seems like in the rush of life, we all forget that every step forward is progress, and it's not always about scales or inches.

I was watching celebrity fit club: boot camp, and there was a woman with a prosthetic leg on the show, putting all the pudge buckets through a weight class, bike ride, and a race.

She beat all of them. Running on ONE leg. If that isn't humbling, then I don't know what is.

I had been told that if I didnt have my ankle surgery I wouldnt be able to walk today. And I even spent some time in a wheelchair, totally voluntary, but it still wasnt fun. I feel like that is something that really defines who I am.

Anyway, my thankful list, here we go....

I am thankful for

My family- You've always been there for me.
My husband- While you are technically family now, you have been there through thick and thin. You have changed my whole perspective on life.
My surgeries- Okay, these suckers... sucked. But I needed them and I am in way less pain than I used to be. I still have pain, but then again... I can walk. I am so thankful for the use of both of my feet. Anyone who has broken a bone can agree, it sucks to be limited.
The internet- With out this wonderful invention I would never have found Fat[free]Me's blog or Bitch Cakes, or any one else for that matter. I would never have known that REAL people can make real differences in their bodies. Also, I'd never have found LOLcats. Hehe ;)
My new town- While I desperately want to move away from you, I have found some nice little trails and parks, I enjoy walking round them and watching my husband show off with his roller blades.
Stella-I love you Stella. My precious little bike. :3 PS: I am getting a regular bike for the Spring and Summer, so I may not ride you as much.
My shape ups- Best $100 I ever spent on a pair of shoes. Note: Also the only pair of shoes I spent more than $50 on. You have so much support! You make it easy to walk further without the pain. I love you.
EA Sports Active- It's because of you that I found out that I like boxing. Oooh. Sweet boxing. And the dancing. HAHA.
Bouncy ball, aka Gold's Gym Stability Ball You make sit ups tolerable. I am totally trying push ups on you this week. It should be interesting.
Me- Most of all though, I am thankful for me. I have the ability to change how I look, what I do, and what I eat. It all starts with me before anything else. I am so thankful that I have the ability to do anything and everything that I want to do.

While the scale may not reflect everything I want it to, I know that I have come very far in a short amount of time. What are you most thankful for?

Weekly Log March 22nd

I did my weekly weigh in and log, and good news all around! I tracked all week, I even walked a little, and I managed to still lose some weight! Here we go

As for what I have lost and my fancy scale stats, VERY good news on this part!

You can see I have decreased my body fat % by over half a point, I increased my water hydration, and I have reduced my BMI and also lost 2 lbs since the last log! Wow!

My measurements were equally impressive!

Bust 43" -.25"
Waist 42" -1"
Hips 49" no change

My arm, thigh, and calf still have not moved, but its not that surprising really.

I also managed to get in 215 minutes of walking which is on par of what I should be walking weekly. I am trying to do an average of 30 minutes a day. Now my log shows that I only walked twice this week, which is okay, because I walked longer than 30 minutes each session. In fact it was over an hour each time.

This comes from YOU on a Diet, and it says the best way to jump start your exercise is to walk for 30 minutes at least, daily. No excuses. If the weather sucks, walk around your living room and blah blah blah. Honestly, I am just excited I hit the target time with little effort.

How are you all doing on your weight loss adventures?

Sunday, March 21, 2010

Another NSV (nonscale victory)

Drumroll please

This week's NSV is.....

Less backfat! Yay! I no longer have back tits! I hadn't really noticed until I slipped on a nightie that has a plunging back. I noticed the nightie was looser and is now almost too big! I turned and looked in the mirror, less fat rolls! I didnt have a lot to begin with, but enough to be noticeable. I can't wait until I am able to wear backless dresses or halter tops again! Right now, my bewbies are still too big to wear that sort of thing without ample support, but meh.


Talk about a motivation booster! Get out there and get moving, less back tits, who would have thought?!

Saturday, March 20, 2010

Planning to Procrastinate

I am living proof why you should never ever plan to do something you can do today, tomorrow.

I've always been a procrastinator, even in school. It's mostly served me well. I would put off a paper or something then come up with something brilliant a few hours before it was due, and I would often get better grades on these papers.

Anyway, fast forward to this week.

I hadnt been exercising this week, and kept thinking "I'll do it tomorrow"
Well now I have this hideous cold or something that is inhibiting me from breathing properly (Can you say "mouth breather")

Now I am feeling crappy, I can't breathe properly and I haven't exercised in a few days, that makes me feel even worse.

However, I am still trying to eat right and the good thing about being sick is that you dont really have an appetite which means its easier to keep my belly full.

I have lost almost a lb this week, and that's exciting! I am also looking forward to summer and looking for a tankini this year. I don't think I can get to "bikini" status this year but maybe a two piece can be achieved. Time to get back on track now that I have a goal in mind.

Just a tablespoon

Today I was sick
Not sure why I got ill but it started two days ago with a sore throat and it's progressed to a head cold.

I finally got off my lazy butt and went to the store, I needed more kleenex. I wanted the puffs plus with lotion.

I bought those and a can of frosting. Is it a can? tub? jar? whatever, point is I was craving some chocolate and it was only a dollar.

I couldnt wait to get home and eat it.

I took a few bites with a TABLESPOON and it was pretty sugary, not very tasty. But I had a few more. Then I had a what the hell am I doing moment. I am sick, not feeling good, husband was at work, and I am eating a tub of frosting in the kitchen alternating with blowing my nose. It didn't even taste good, why was I doing this?

Obviously it was emotional eating. And I had my fix. It was okay. I just threw the tub away and moved on. I instead drank some nyquil and took a nap haha

Thursday, March 18, 2010

How I Got Fat aka Life

I was over at Paula's blog reading her self interview and decided to do one myself.

1. Did you realize you were fat?

Honestly, I think the information was there but my brain couldn't accept it. My mother had called me often and asked if I was okay, and she told me I gained a lot of weight. I even stepped on the scale at her house and it said 220 lbs and I thought "Her scale must be off" but its right on par with my doctor's scale and I knew this. I was that deep in denial.

2. What was your "aha" moment when you realized you were fat?

I had realized it shortly after losing my job. I was a mess during the last few months working there that I was having panic attacks and passing out. It was then I called my doctor and got on Xanax. He told me, bold faced, that I need to lose weight. But the desire to lose wasn't there.

3. What motivated you to lose weight?

Firstly, I was just married. When we got the wedding pics back I did a loud OMG! Is that me?! I flipped out. And I gave my doctor a call. He put me on Meridia and I lost 20 lbs in a little under 6 weeks. But it's so expensive and I was unemployed and still, not really motivated, so I gained it all back. Typically, January rolled around and I finally had the desire. I wanted to change, for me. I always said I was going to do it for my husband but I realized that I can't do it for him alone. I need to put myself first on this, if I wanted to succeed. It was a very emotional moment and I cried myself to sleep that night.

4. How did you feel at your heaviest?

Stressed the fuck out. I was planning a wedding. LOL how else do you feel? But very happy. I just knew I could be thinner. I even tried to lose 20lbs before the big day and managed to lose... nil.

FANTASTIC motivation.

We went to an amusement park for our honeymoon and I remember getting checked, double checked, and triple checked that I was secured in the rides properly because I borderlined on "persons of exceptional size" Luckily I was not booted off any rides. That would be traumatic and there would be no telling how I would have handled it.

5. If you lost all the weight would it make you happier?

YES. But mostly because I accomplished something I put my mind to. Also because I don't give a shit who you think you are, you will be happier if you are not in a muu muu. LOL
Also I am a bit self-absorbed and I love to shop. Mmmm. Clothes. Let me wipe this drool off...

6. What do you look forward to most about losing all the weight?

Being pain free. With a weak ankle and knee, the extra weight kills me. It hurts so bad. But I am also looking forward to more sex and not feeling like my husband is just pitying me. LOL Again, shopping too.

7. What is the hardest part of losing weight?

Keeping myself motivated and in control. I am seeing slow results and usually this is discouraging, but I dont want to be a muu muu lady. It's the only thing that keeps me going. Not to mention, one slip up and I gain 5 lbs. Okay, to be honest my slip ups are more like mudslides (YUM) because I spiral out of control. Its learning to forgive myself, put down the fork, and get over it and back on track.

8. Can you imagine life without sweets? Reeses cups?

OMG please. I ate one like 3 weeks ago and it tasted like ass. they used to be my favourite. Sugar free pudding is very yummy. And Weight Watchers have these peanut butter cup sundaes. But I stopped buying those after I bought 5 boxes (10 sundaes) and didnt eat anything but those for a few days lol

Aww. I'm out of questions. :( Post lots so I can answer them. I love surveys/questionnaires.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010


I am getting my hair done tomorrow.
I am very happy and I am taking my grandma too! Wee!!
I got everything sorted for the new car today, and I even got to go out to Bob Evans for a sit down dinner.

I had Pot Roast Stroganoff (yum) the small portion, which was extremely filling.
425 calories.

It came with parmasean crusted garlic bread, but I didn't finish both slices, however, I still counted them.
2 @ 195 each

For a total of 815! Now that seems like a lot, but remember, I don't normally eat all of my calories in any given day.

I had a chicken sandwich earlier (320)

Which brings my total up to 1135 for the day of my allotted 1420.

I still need to exercise too. I have been doing laundry lately and it's pretty much taken up all of my free time. I am washing EVERY thing I own, as I am getting rid of a lot of it.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Feelin' good

Today I wake up (about 10 minutes ago actually)
I strip down. Step on the scale.
I am down 2 lbs from yesterday, and .6 from my lowest weight.

Soon I will be in Onederland. Onederland how I have missed you. I promise I will not visit this time, I will make you my permanent home. You are no longer a vacation spot.


Monday, March 15, 2010

Fancy Scale Stats and Measurements

Here we go, some fancy Spreadsheet work.

My measurements:

Fancy scale stats

Goals for the week:

1) Stella, 25 minutes 1x this week, 3x of 15 minutes.
2) Wash, dry, bag all of the clothes that no longer fit (whether too small or too big now) or that I don't like (which is 90%)

Also I have decided to buy whole blocks of cheese and shred them as I need them. I figure this will help me out in two ways:

A) It burns more calories
2) I figure it will help me save on cheese. I go through 3-bags of cheese a WEEK. I get a little excessive (gasp!) on it.

Ho boy...

Yeah, I didn't track all week.
I rode Stella once. (4 miles, 23 minutes, at least I did that much)
I walked around the mall once.

And then I ate a lot.
I was cranky all week long.

I woke up today and after I had eaten and woken up I remembered "Shit, it's weigh in day!" Rushed to scale.

It obviously reflected my poor choices for the week and I gained a half pound. Which may or may not be accurate as I am *still* having issues with regularity.
I think its time for some veggie soup!

I will just have to be good this week and track what I eat.

But today I put on a pair of workout pants, before they were a little snug, they werent tight but there was a bit of pressure on my stomach. Today I slipped them on and they felt right. A little lose.

I have lost enough weight to move down a clothing size, now I am an 18ish. I say that because of the different brands and what not. My wedding dress was a size 16 from Fashion Bug and it fit perfectly. I haven't tried it on again, I probably will soon though. (It's more of a sundress) My size 20's are too big but I will keep wearing them anyway until I can afford new clothes lol

I have a busy couple of weeks ahead of me. This weekend we are visiting a friend out of state and she is one of those naturally skinny model like people (she actually was a model, at one point.) and I would like to lose a few more pounds before she sees me again, as it's been a few months. If I could make it a nice rounded 20 lbs since she saw me last that would be great. I like round numbers.

I have to register and insure the new car tomorrow, should be fun. I get cable as well. YAY cable.

Next week I am getting my hair done and paying for my grandma as well. I have to start saving for my anniversary too. I really hope we can go to Mackinac Island, but if we can't I am sure we will find something nice closer to home.

I have my weekly report, but as I didn't track much you would just see a bunch of zeros, no point in putting it up really.

I got my awesome scale working again, my body fat percentage went down. I will have to start making a spreadsheet for that information as well. I had a BF% of 50.9 before and now its at 49.9, a whole point! YAY! I am also still underhydrated by its estimates. I am supposed to be at 50 and I am at 41.1%

I will have to take my measurements and check my BMI and I will upload that information too

YAY okay, I have it and its good news!

Bust: 43.25 inches
Waist: 43 inches (YAY It's smaller, not by much but a little)
Hips: 50 inches
Arm: 15
Thigh: 26
Calf: 17

The only thing that changed was my bust (.75 inch) and my waist (a full inch)
Which brings my total inches lost around my waist as 6 in 7 weeks!
Grand total inches lost are 7.25 in 7 weeks! Fantastic!

My BMI was 37.25 last week. This week it is 37.21! A small change, but in the positive direction.

All in all, I'd say it is some rather good news. I am not worried about the lack of movement on my thighs/calves inches wise because I have been working out on Stella building up those muscles and they are starting to show definition now, meaning whatever I am losing in fat, I am gaining in muscle, which is good news anyway you look at it.

Sunday, March 14, 2010

Weekends Suck.

Weekends suck for me.
I work at home and do most of my job on the weekends.
Hubby is gone all day delivering pizzas to your lazy asses. No offense, I ordered pizza today too.

But I hate weekends. All of them. Never is one good.
That being said,

This one was not very bad. I got to visit all of my family. All 4 people! LOL
I bought a new car. Well, not new new. But new to me.


I have been extremely add and klutzy.

Yesterday I was at my parents. I knocked over a soda.
Then I went to my uncles to housesit. Again. Knocked over a soda.
On the way home, stopped at McDonalds got a 10 piece nugget and a Dr Pepper.
"Dammit," I thought, "should have got a bottled water."

I pull out of McD's and promptly drop my soda. All over my husbands new car. Fanfuckingtastic.

I lost $20 in 30 feet, walking from the house to the car. I later found it. In a pocket.

I blame this partially on getting no sleep and partially because I am a retard lol

Took a nap when I got home but woke up an hour later because of the cats and I was just having a really bad day. Emotional breakdown. No sleep. Time of the month. Annoying cats. I took a xanax and slept all day today.

I am feeling a bit better now

Saturday, March 13, 2010

How to eat your veggies if you're a carnivore

Ever since I can remember I've never eaten veggies. EVER. I don't like a damn one. Every time I was "forced" to eat one, I would gag and throw up. I hated the taste. I hated the texture. And I hated whoever was trying to make me eat it, at the moment anyway. My poor mom. :( She tried!

This happened all through my life. I didn't like tomatoes, mushroom, spinach, broccoli, onion, green pepper, yellow pepper, any pepper! I dont even really like corn, though its a starch. Nothing. None of the "Easy" veggies. Definitely nothing hard core, like brussels sprouts or beets. Ewww. Forget okra. I don't even know what that is! Collared greens? Blech. Cauliflower, fuck off! No way!
I dont like fruit either, but thats a different blog post.

What is a carnivore to do? You can't eat healthy without your veggies, it's impossible. Sure I could throw away everything, and I mean EVERYTHING, in my pantry and fridge then stock up only on veggies and starve to death then eat some. But I would just pick up the phone and call delivery, so that'd be a waste.

Solutions? I have two of them. And they both are amazing.

The first is this handy-dandy cookbook called Deceptively Delicious by Jerry Seinfeld's wife, Jessica. It's for moms who are fed up with picky eaters, but since I am the picky eater, it works for me too. Basically you take all your veggies, cook them then stuff them in your food processor until they are a puree or slush. Then add to normal food. None the wiser.

The second is V8. A 6.5 oz can is a full day's serving of veggies. You can be trendy and microwave it, it tastes like tomato soup! OR if you find it disgusting that way (Like me!) then you can use it in any recipe with a "red" sauce. Lasagna? check! Spaghetti? Double check! Hamburger helper? Check! (Just replace one cup of water with the juice) Chili? CHECK! I start shoving it in everything. Anything not that color sauce, I buy frozen veggies and obliterate them in my magic bullet until they probably arent considered veggies any more and are more considered "liquid"

Now, I must mention that I have started to eat some veggies in their unaltered or obliterated form. I like spinach, tomatoes (only if they are diced) and green peppers. I can eat carrots if they are cooked, but not raw. I also put onion in everything now. As well as garlic. Mmm. But they don't count.

(I also love Spinach and Artichoke dip, but only because I discovered it while I was drinking and said hey this is delicious! hubby convinced me to make it at home, and again, I obliterated everything in my magic bullet. I got points for the creamiest dip!)

I write this blog because I have been reading a lot of vegan blogs lately and no matter how you dress up eggplant it still looks like rabbit food to me. I know I will never be a vegan and thats not the point. Even if I have to hide my veggies for the rest of my life, at least I am eating them. Maybe some day I can eat them in their natural form but I don't think so.

Friday, March 12, 2010

Thursday Antics

Yesterday I walked around my mall for about 45 minutes at a moderate pace of 3 miles per hour, so I figured I did about 2.75 miles or so. Then I hopped on Stella (much to my displeasure, I wasn't in the mood to ride) and I rode for 4 miles. I actually had to say out loud that I wouldn't quit. I couldn't give up. I was worth it. It was only one more fucking mile. Am I that weak that I can't go another mile? That I like being this way? Of course I had my headphones in so I was actually talking rather loud and hubby looked at me like I was nuts... but hey! it worked! I went 4 miles! YAY! Now that's my goal for the week. Do it a few more times, and hopefully it will become easier. I went at a slower pace, I did 23 minutes so it was almost a 6 minute mile on average, not too bad.

Slower pace lol
That cracks me up. When I first started I couldnt do a mile in under 7 minutes. Now I think I so slow going at 6 to a mile.

Something's working.

Since I work at home I often find it hard to keep motivated about anything really (except paychecks and I look forward to getting Netflix in the mail) but this week I have made myself get ready as soon as I wake up. Put in my contacts, do my hair and make up, force myself to get dressed (its a chore) but so far every day I have been doing it and I can honestly say I feel a lot better about myself.

Today my uncle's girlfriend (at this point, I call her my pseudo-aunt; they've been together for about 5 years now and are married in all but name practically) is coming by with the car that we are going to buy, I can't wait to see it and have a little company as well.

It's 2.00 pm here and I just got up at 12.30, now I am starting to feel hungry. I woke up at 8 am with the same feeling but just went back to sleep instead. I think its time for a little beefus.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Trying to Lose it!

I have mentioned that I have been using this app on the iPhone called Lose it! It's free, its not perfect, but it works.

There are a lot of foods that arent in the database and I was getting rather frustrated and started looking for other apps. The others that I found are very drastically different from Lose it! The same foods have different calories, which doesn't match up with what the food says on the label or what the website says. Very confusing and inconvenient. One feature I do like though, is the option to input your own recipes, your own foods, etc. I guess I will enter every thing in manually.

Like I dont have the time or something lol that is all I have is time. Am I really that lazy that I don't want to take a few extra minutes to type in the exact amount of calories so I don't have to worry about "ballpark" figures?

Today we went to the mall, one of my favourite places to walk around. I love window shopping and regular shopping even more! We stopped in Barnes and Noble and I looked through my favourite art book, Bettie Page by Olivia! They paint all these lovely pinups of the lovely Bettie Page! It's very sexy!

But we did three laps and we even climbed up the steps instead of taking the escalator, and the steps there are STEEP! My thighs were protesting the whole time (which was only about 20 steps or so) and I was like wow, is it just me or are these steps steep? I look over at hubby and he has a pained expression on his face. Yeah, he pants, they are.

So if someone skinny and in relatively good shape like my hubby can't get up them easily, it makes me happy that I did it fairly well.

I had a steak taquito (320 calories) and I walked for 45 minutes @ 3mph (184 calories) so I am at a net 136 calories for the day so far!

In other news, not related to diet and exercise, but equally important, we finally found a car for hubby and are able to buy it this weekend! this is very exciting because now I will not be house-bound any more! YAY! Not to mention, no extra car payment! YAY!

Wednesday, March 10, 2010


Okay holy shit!
Yesterday I was super depressed because I was feeling sexy, then took pics and saw how erm much farther I still have left to go.

Well I threw my scale under the sink and said good bye until Monday. I found my tape measure and decided to also keep track of that, as well as calories. I made a spread sheet, even! YAY!

When I started Curves, my bust-waist-hip measurements were 44"-49"-51" I was a sphere! UGH! 6 weeks later and I have already made a lot of progress! I thought just my ass was firmer and my thighs too but wasn't seeing much in the way of gut reduction.
Yesterday, my measurements were: 44"-44"-50" YAY! I lost 5" on the waist and 1" on the hips! That is so cool! If I can lose a few more inches off of my waist, I will have my hourglass figure back. Oh god how I miss it. I cant wait!! YAY!! Thank you Stella!!

I decided that I am going to have my husband take more pictures of me and especially of the two of us together. We hardly have any! I have sort of always hated having my picture taken but now I look back and I was like aww, well I dont want to forget anything now!

I am feeling emotionally better today, and I even kept on track yesterday! I had 2 pieces of pizza and a small piece of birthday cake! (It was whipped frosting and not the delicious butter cream, so I didn't want a lot anyway) I didn't know that when I cut a piece though, so I still get the credit for portion control! YAY

I got a workout dvd in the mail from Netflix today, I hope that it's fun. I'm really picky about them so I don't even know why I bother but I am going to give it a shot anyway. Stella gets her 15 minutes of fame today as well, maybe longer.

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Motivation and the Alternative

Today I was totally bummed out when I had hubby take some pics. I had a delusional reality that I was a lot skinnier than I was previously, it put me in a funk. After some motivational encouragement from my mother, who is a fantastic cheerleader when she wants to be, she asked me: "What's the alternative [if I give up now]?"

The truth of the matter is there isn't an alternative. Well there is, but it's not one I would like.

This woman is so fat, she cannot even stand up to eat her own cake. How depressing.
I used to laugh so hard at this pic, but secretly I feared I'd become her. And now I know its true.

So time for some motivation and a nice list. Because I like lists. They make me happy.

Being Healthy vs Being Cake lady

Pros to being healthy:

More energy
Better self body image (we've already proved I am delusional)
Better self esteem
More confidence (it's not the same)
More sex
Long walks
No more indigestion
No worries of high blood pressure


Are there any? I dont think I'll turn vegan or anything. No offense to vegans I just have enough trouble with veggies now lol

Pros to being the cake lady?

....Are there any?! Besides eating all the peanut butter m&ms I wanted? Erm not really.

Cons: the less obvious ones

Poor dental health (even if you went in for cleanings regularly all the shit you stuff down your gullet can't be good for your teeth)
Getting tired from singing out loud.
Not being able to wipe your own ass. I am sure that you hit this point eventually, I can't imagine that.
Not being able to get out of bed, go down stairs, get in your car, etc
Not being able to pick up your kid, pet, etc
No more rollercoasters! :( I love roller coasters!

Even if I didn't lose a single pound (unlikely, but let's pretend) because every lb turned to muscle, I would be a body builder. But since that is physically incapable unless there are roids involved and hormones etc, I am sure I will lose lots.

I miss being able to cross my legs.
I miss boots. I miss short skirts
Midriff tops
Where are my collar bones?
I don't want to do the "parade wave" anymore so my arm fat doesnt flap in the wind
I want to go into Victoria's Secret and buy everything that fits. Pants. Tops. Dresses. Lingerie.

I distinctly remember running around all day when I was in high school back and forth across the football field for several hours at a time and only eating once or twice.

I miss deep, real sleep. Not the fat coma I have now
I miss wearing my husbands pants. Yeah, I used to be able to fit into them
I miss tank tops that fit

I want to go to an amusement park and walk around all day, ride every single ride. I miss being tan. I dont want to lug my fat ass outside. So now I am fat and vampire like but without any of the charm or sex appeal. Great.

I dont want to blow out a leg or a knee or anything from standing on it too long. I don't want another ankle surgery because I can't support myself any longer. I don't want to resort to a fat farm or Lap band surgery because I can't put down the bon bons for a year. I do not want the alternative.

I do not want to see the 200+ number on the scale ever again.
I do not want to have to search for a pair of pants that doesnt have the buttons missing or a top that is so strained to contain my gut.
I do not want to see the pity in anyone's eyes.
I do not want to be "cute" anymore(in fact, I banned that word from my husband's vocabulary, because it instantly makes me feel bad about myself lol)
I do not want to wait for tomorrow.

I will not compare my progress with anyone else's in a negative sense. My body will go at its own pace and I will go with it too. I will not set unrealistic goals. I will not look at people with naturally smaller frames and feel like I am a beluga whale.

Can't is no longer in my dictionary. I can't do this or that, will never come from my mouth or in my thoughts. I can. It's a matter if I will or if I won't.

I want to wear corsets not because they suck in your fat, but because I think they are sexy. I want stockings, thigh highs, did I mention boots?! Dammit I want some boots!

I am putting myself first. Everything else is a close second. I am not losing weight for my husband, to make anyone jealous, etc. I am losing weight for me.
As my mom used to say, "It's all about me me me me me me me!"

I know I am spoiled and used to getting my way so this will be a testament of will to keep going when I don't see immediate results. I want to change now. I will change now. And I will not stop. I will not give up.

Because I do not see the alternative as a viable option.

A little background history.

As it says at the top and side of my blog, when I got married, I weighed 237.5 lbs. I was closer to 250 than I was 200. At a short 5ft5 that put me at about a 39 BMI, almost 100 lbs over what I should weigh at the max.

After the honey moon I felt so miserable, I didn't know what to do anymore. I was supposed to be so happy, after all, I had just gotten married. I loved my husband but couldn't help but feel that I was no good for him because I was a fat slob. (totally completely not true btw, I know we are a great match, but it seemed logical at the time)

My mom, probably tired of hearing me bitch, and sad that I was a Macy's Day Parade float, convinced me to go to my family doctor and get some magic little diet pills.

I went, he looked horrified at my numbers on the scale. 240. Shit. Even heavier. He took my blood pressure several times, each time it was barely within the normal range, and that was after I had calmed down. (I get anxious he will tell me I have high blood pressure, so then I get high blood pressure... vicious cycle)

He wanted to do blood work but as I didn't have any insurance at the time and was recently unemployed and still collecting benefits, I declined. I know I probably have a low thyroid or some other underlying condition. The main thing was I was fat. All that other stuff can be treated after I get out of the danger zone.

He gave me Meridia. It's super expensive.
I took it for 6 weeks and I lost 21 pounds. I lost 15 of it within 2 weeks and the rest dropped off a little more slowly. It made me not want to eat. Food wasn't even slightly appealing. All it did was make me anorexic temporarily.

So I quit taking them. I stopped losing weight, they stopped making me feel that way, and to continue to lose weight and suppress hunger, I would have needed a larger dose, which cost more. Wasn't worth it.

I got down to 216. I remember when I hit 219 and was out of the 220's. I FREAKED out, because I read the scale wrong. I thought I had GAINED weight. It took me several attempts at reading it to make sure I wasn't insane.

I didn't bother to try and change my eating habits, sneak in my veggies or even exercise. I didn't bother tracking calories or anything because I wasn't eating. And after the psychological effects wore off (ie the hunger suppressant) my body reacted violently. Suddenly I was so hungry I could not get enough to eat. EVER. It was like I was stranded on a desert island for a few weeks and just got rescued. I was a mess. But again, I wasn't ready to face the fat. I gained it all back. Every. Last. Pound.

Around September, I decided, hey, I'm going to lose 20 lbs before my birthday! (In October) and I got down to 224, considering myself a failure for not hitting 20 lbs in 4 short weeks, I got depressed again, and in January, I decided to do it this time, for realz.

I signed up for Curves, got weighed and measured. 229 is what the scale read. I went twice. Mostly because of car related issues and also because everyone was very nosy, wanting to know everything about me and yammer at me all the time, and I don't do well with people. Plus, I didn't have anyone that I actually liked to go with.

So I started doing Wii Fit and EA Active, got my exercise bike, started tracking calories, and taking control and responsibility for my life. I am 22 years old. I should not be on blood pressure medicine, diet pills, or anything else. I should be in the prime of my life.

Since the end of January, I have lost 7.5 pounds. In 6 weeks.
I have to say that I am a little disappointed in the scale movement, but I have had lots of NSV's that have been rewarding. My pants fit better. I can now carry groceries and go up 10 steps to my apartment without wheezing. I can ride Stella for increasingly longer periods of time. I walked 3 miles yesterday and felt great. My ass is firmer. My thighs are firmer. I subconsciously hold in my stomach when I walk, and I started noticing that it's getting easier.

Monday, March 8, 2010

Proof I used to be Skinny.

See? I told you my husband was hot. And I used to be skinny. This was late 2007, either in September or early October. I remember being so secretly excited that I weighed LESS than a man for once! He was 185, I was 180.

Oh how I miss you, Onederland.

Weekly Log and Etc

Time for my weekly log. I didn't track yesterday, I meant to, just never did. Anyway, it's no surprise really that I only lost 1 lb this week, but 1 lb lost is better than 1 lb gained.

Weekly accomplishments:
I tracked 6/7 days.
I didn't do a single situp.
I did 15 minutes of Hell--I mean, Wii Fit
I rode Stella for 25.00 minutes!


Today we went for a walk on a trail near our place. It's relatively newish, at least new to me anyway, not sure how old it is, but it looks new. Anyway, we went once last year and I ended up not going very far, maybe .5 mile round trip (LAME)

We went much, much farther today (3 miles round trip) and boy do my legs burn. My knees hurt, my calves itch, and my thighs were quivering. Whimpering. My thighs are such babies. My ankle is protesting today but eh, it will get over it. I wore my super expensive Sketchers Shape-ups. I spent $100 on the shoes that "you never have to step into a gym for" but really, if you walked all the time, you wouldnt need to go to the gym. Good ploy Sketchers. I like them anyway, lots of cushioning.

Here's some pics from the trail.

Wait, what does that say?
Yes it really says Beware of Troll

How much fun! Yay!

This week's goals:

If it's nice and not rainy, get my ass out to the trail again. Hubby said it was even safe enough to walk alone on. I'm buying pepper spray just in case though.

Actually do some situps this week

Track my food

Ride Stella at least 3 miles a day, preferably 4+

Sunday, March 7, 2010

Naked in front of the mirror

Today I stood naked in front of my mirror.
Not really uncommon, that.
I stared at my ass for a long time.
Furrowed brow as I twist this way and that.
Trying hard to recollect whether or not I had that mole there.
Trying to determine if my ass looks smaller? No. Not smaller per se.

Yes. Much firmer.
I turn the other way and look again.
Brow no longer furrowed.
A small smile creeps across my face.

Thank you, Stella!

Saturday, March 6, 2010

Gasp.. Ugh.. Bah...!

Today I hop on Wii Fit, like I promised myself I would, and I go through the retard motions, agonizing over how long these 15 minutes are, panting, weezing, gasping as my legs are straining to finish the Basic Step. (I got a new high score on it, so I guess that's improvement?)

I got new high scores on everything, actually, so I would consider it improvement, but I really hate Wii Fit, how long it takes to burn calories.

For instance, I only burned 68 calories in 15 minutes.
I also rode Stella for 15 minutes today and burned 270.

Hmm which is more beneficial really? Duh. Stella.

Speaking of Stella, I was so depressed that I only went 15 minutes today because yesterday I did 25.00! YEP you read that right, I did 25 minutes! I did one session of 5 then about an hour later I did another session of 20. I went 4.44 miles and burned 444 calories.

I couldn't figure out why I couldn't do longer than that. It wasn't my brain this time but it was actually my body, telling me it couldn't do it anymore. I was so confused. Am I pushing myself too hard? I did 10 less minutes today and I am struggling, I dont get it? Then I realized, duh, I had done a total of 30 minutes working out today! So that got me a bit farther than just exercising on Stella. Thanks Wii Fit!

Wii fit also said I was skinnier but I am not going to take that into account until Monday, when I weigh in. I've been having sort of a meh week, feeling way hungrier than usual, so I have been trying to reign that in.

I think its because I had not been eating my 1431 a day, so my body was getting way less energy, then I was forcing it to work out on top of that. in fact I have gone over my allotted calories (with exercise even!) a couple days this week. I am a bit disappointed but have realized that I need to get back on program and today was an attempt to do that.

Friday, March 5, 2010

How's This for Motivation?

I found this funny weight loss joke from Ellen on Weight Loss Bloggers, and had to share! I wish this were true, I think I'd die first!

A man calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. weight loss program.

The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck.

She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company.

The sign reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me."

Without a second thought, he takes off after her.

A few miles later huffing and puffing, he finally gives up.

The same girl shows up for the next four days and the same thing happens.

On the fifth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10 lbs. as promised.

He calls the company and orders their 5-day/20 pound program.

The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning and beautiful woman he has ever seen in his life.

She is wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you catch me you can have me."

Well, he's out the door after her like a shot.

This girl is in excellent shape and he does his best, but no such luck.

So for the next four days, the same routine happens with him gradually getting in better and better shape.

Much to his delight on the fifth day when he weighs himself, he discovers that he has lost another 20 lbs. as promised.

He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50 pound program.

"Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone. "This is our most rigorous program."

"Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this good in years."

The next day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he finds a huge muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads,"If I catch you, you are mine!!!"

He lost 63 pounds that week. ;-)

Being Lazy

I havent been working out like I should and Stella is yelling at me to get my fat ass moving. I over ate yesterday. I need to get back on program.

So I decided that even though I am not motivated at all to work out on Stella, I was going to see how fast I could ride a mile. Simple right? it's only a mile, and I have already done 3.33 in one session before! Easy peasy, right?

Well it took a lot of effort on my part, mentally. I rode as fast as I could but at .65 mile I was sweating, cursing, and slowing down. But I looked at it and said out loud "How pathetic! You can't even do a mile!" then I thought of how humilating it would be to tell my husband. And how much worse it would be to tell my own mother, that I was doomed to be fat. I can hear her now. In fact, I'm talking to her now. Shhh...

By the time I was done mentally berating myself, I looked again and I was at .90 miles. lol I guess I just needed to take my mind off things. And while I only did 1 mile on the nose, I did it in 5 minutes and 30 seconds. When I first started it took me over 7 minutes to do a mile.

I will try for another 2 miles today, because I know I can do it.

Lasagna was delicious last night. And even though I shoved a ton of veggies in it, I am still not seeing the effects of an increased fiber diet, to put it nicely. I am constipated lol :(

I bought the entire collection of Seinfeld and it came in the mail yesterday. It was at my complex office so I went down and the lady told me that we are getting new fitness center equipment and new sundeck furniture soon. I don't know why she told me about the fitness? Maybe because I was out of breath running the block and a half to the office for my beloved Seinfeld? I dont know. I didn't run, btw. I drove.

I said I couldnt wait for the sundeck furniture and thanked her for the package. I restrained myself from tearing into the package until we got in the car, where I promptly opened it up and oogled, ahhed, ooohed, and hugged it.

I have been trying not to binge on the episodes because hubby hasn't seen them all (I've seen most, if not all) and promised we would only watch them together. It's hard not to watch them.

Thursday, March 4, 2010

I love my pastas!

I love my pastas. Especially my lasagna. It is my slightly skewed opinion that I make the best lasagna of my family and friends. I'd brag and say in the entire world but I have a fragile enough ego.

Case in point: One day I made lasagna for my dad, when I was still living at home. He had a plateful. A second plateful. Then he took it to lunch that day. My uncle came by and I said hey, I made lasagna, wanna plate? Ohhhh! He scarfed his down as fast as I've ever seen him eat.

The pan was officially demolished in less than an hour. Next day uncle's girlfriend calls me up and tells me how uncle had raved over my lasagna. Needless to say, I was beaming.

I often make it for my friends, its one of my most requested meals to make in fact, and I love to make it. I love to cook for friends and family, and it's always been my firm belief that food makes everything better. (Which is why I am fat)

Today I am making a double batch of lasagna, two full pans, we have some friends coming over and I want to make sure everyone gets enough. This is the first time that I have made two pans. I also added in lots of veggies this time around too, onion, green pepper, spinach and some V8 into the sauce.

I hope it turns out. I have been really good today, saving all of my calories for some hearty lasagna and a few pieces of garlic toast. Stella and I have already had our fun for the day as well.

Its nice to know that I don't have to give up my one true love (excluding hubby) just to lose weight!

In other news, its a lot warmer today than it has been and I hope spring is here to stay! We talked to our landlord today (I had to pick up a package in the office) and she is getting new exercise equipment for the fitness center and new pool furniture soon! I am so excited. I can't wait to cat nap in the sun.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Water water everywhere

And lots of it to drink.

Fitting in 8 glasses is a challenge, to put it lightly.
I am having trouble fitting it all down my gullet, and it just doesnt taste as good if you force yourself to drink it.
Maybe it's shitty tap water you say? Mmm no sorry, its delicious spring water, I just cant drink a lot of it. :(

Make some Crystal Light you say? Mm thats a good idea, but requires me to wash a pitcher and I am not that desperate for something with a little "taste" yet.

In other news, it's been two days since I have had any caffeine, in any way shape or form.

Yesterday I went to the store and re-discovered my one true love, other than the hubsy! Sugar FREE pudding. Mmm Jello me love you long time. I got Dulce de Leche and Double Chocolate, both of which are 60 calorie servings.

Now, if I decide to, I can go on a bender and eat all 6 of one type in a setting and call that a meal for the day and not feel like a total glutton! But I don't think I will!
Also, special mention to Allison for giving me the Gorgeous Blogger award also! I hadn't seen it by the time I posted my blog the other day :)

I have been playing the Sims 2 which is a bit addictive and may have had something to do with me not exercising yesterday. I even made a Mr and Mrs He Took My Last Name and have been living out our virtual marriage while enjoying the reality as well. Both of us are gamers so its not surprising. I say things to hubby like "I got you a job in the gamer industry, you are a noob!" and "I wish you cooked this much in real life!" but that last part is a lie. I love cooking.

My Sim also hates cleaning and pouts if she has to say, pick up her dishes or even take a shower LOL

All this water drinking is making me sleepy. I think its time for a nap.

Monday, March 1, 2010

Holy Crap Fatman! An Award!

Holy crap fatman! Someone gave me an AWARD! YAY WOW Thanks! I never thought I'd get one, or that anyone besides my mom and my hubby would even read this blog lol so it's very sweet of So Over Fat to give me one. Aww! I have warm fuzzies.

Now to reveal the mysteries of me (6 of them anyway)

1. I suffer from irrational fears, like snakes coming out of the bathtub drain and monsters under my bed. I blame my mom for this. Although she tried to be funny, apparently she gave birth to a wimp. I still believe these things may happen to me, even though rationally I know they cannot.
2. I have an extreme people-phobia. I hate talking to people if I don't have to. HOWEVER if you get me in a social situation, I become the life of the party and very social.
3. I am constantly homesick. Odd, because I only live half an hour away from my home town and go there every week. I think it's because I miss the dog. And my parents. But the dog is important to me too. Not so much the cat.
4.My husband took my last name, but for a long time we were going to do things the "traditional" way. Then we said the heck with it, it was a stupid tradition and when we got ahold of the Government, even they thought it was a cool idea. We've only had a few people not get it.
5. I just woke up. It's currently 3pm. I'd have slept longer, but felt bad hubby had to work this morning, and just drug my lazy ass out of bed to be nice.
6.There isnt any food in my house. I ate it all. Don't worry, it was diet food and I didn't have much to begin with.

Exciting, eh? Bet you wished you knew me in real life, don't you? LOL

I have to pass this on, but I don't know who to give it to, I think I will hang on to it until I find someone I want to give it to.

As for my weekly report, here it is. I lost .9lbs this week! Which isn't a whole hell of a lot, honestly. And my fancy dancy scale is um a piece of shit, as it's not budged even one iota since I got it. Clothes on, clothes off, morning, noon or night, it said I weighed in at 225.4 lbs. Which is what I weighed when I got it. I checked this with my other scale for accuracy, and it said the same. But now it's perpetually stuck at that number. It's annoying and frustrating, because I spent $40 on the damn thing.

Here is my Food and Exercise Log for the week:

You will note a few things: That I did 2300 worth of exercise in a single week, and that I did not eat all my calories allotted for each day.
Both of these are accurate. I haven't felt very hungry lately so I haven't been eating. I usually have about 400 calories left at the end of the day.

On to the mini goals list!
Last week I promised to ride Stella like the wind for at least 15mins a session, 3x. CHECK
I also promised I would do 3 miles on the beast. CHECK
I also said I'd do 3 sessions of 100 situps... I got in 2. I can't be *that* good!

I also set a personal goal to clean my bathroom, and I did!
I also logged my food and exercise for a straight week! Woohoo!

This weeks goals are:
Stella, pushing the limits. 4x 15minutes.
Stella, pushing the limits part deux, 3.5 miles at least once.
Situps, with handweights, at least once of 100
Keep tracking food and exercise.

Same as last week almost.
Also, let's throw in 15 minutes of Wii Fit in there too. Let's switch it up a bit.

Same time next week, kiddos!