Salt and Licking My Wounds

It's my monthly time. I really wish I was like other women in this respect and wanted to eat loads of chocolate, cakes, and ice cream. But no. I crave salt.

The absolute worst thing about it is all I want to eat for 3-5 days straight is macaroni and cheese.

Cheese in general

Peanut butter

Salted butter

I'm okay about chocolate. I love it, don't get me wrong, but I can go a while without it and be alright. I don't need or crave fast food anymore - although we ate pizza this week (with salty ham, light cheese, and light sauce but got 'pan' style crust since Brian doesn't like thin.) We also had some friends over from out of town and we went to the mall where we ate Burger King.

Ugh. I have been feeling bloated and unhappy for the last few days. Last night I guzzled so much water. I am drinking lots today too. The scale says +3.5 lbs but I'm sure its mostly salt/water retention.

I have an ear infection. Not wearing earrings for so long has caused my ear lobes to freak out and now I am tending to that. Besides being insanely itchy, it hasn't been too bad.

I have also been dealing with a little stress from the dog. Max has developed an unsavory habit and that irritates me. He likes to eat the crotch out of all of my clothes. Underwear, shorts, pants, sleepwear... anything with my scent on it.

I'm irritated because 1) I never catch him doing this. I've been dogging him for days. 2) He gets sick off of it. Apparently eating all manners of fabric is not good for the digestive system. 3) It's my own fault for leaving my clothes within puppy reach (aka on the floor)

Needless to say all the (remaining) laundry was picked up and put away or washed and put away. We had to deal with another vomiting issue from Max this morning and still have not found what he got into. None of the clothes are salvageable. None. He rips out all the crotch.

I'm assuming he does this for one of three reasons: 1) boredom? 2) I put off a very attractive pheromone and it's driving him wild he can't do anything about it (he's fixed) 3) he is secretly disgruntled by me or trying to take Brian out of the 'competition'. My theory on this is he thinks if Brian can't smell my good smelling lady scent secretions (like animals do in the wild) then he won't know that I am a fertile female and Max will be the top male? Except he's fixed and non aggressive.

Maybe he just is bored. I have no idea

If I could catch him doing it, I would stop him. All you have to do is tell him a big NO one time and he won't do it ever again.... I may have to sacrifice another pair of sweatpants in a trap to bait him and catch him in the act.

Anyone have any advice? Aside from "pick all your shit up off the floor" because I've done that!