Juuuust Kidding!

Oh so tonight I started getting contractions. First they were the little ant hill ones that I could barely feel that I have been having for weeks, apparently. Then they started to get a little stronger- I was at least noticing them without thinking too hard about it. Then they started getting even stronger. The tightness was starting to get uncomfortable.

It was really distracting to work, but I kept on going anyway, making sure to time the contractions as they happened. They were very regular. Lasting about a minute, and always 15 minutes apart.

Then, another hopeful sign that labor might be starting. I had to go. Like, go go. Go poo. A lot. Diarrhea is another sign of early labor starting. Things were looking great, despite the fact I was tied to the toilet now and couldn't work. I logged off and said I'd keep every one updated... if things didn't progress in a few hours, I'd go back to work. If they progressed, well, everyone would get an email.

I'm in the bathroom, fielding questions from Brian, Googling labor signs on my iPad, and trying not to throw up- nausea- another sign of early labor. I'm happy that things are continuing. Contractions are slowly going up the scale of "huh, what was that?" to "omg it's been 15 minutes, here comes another one, brace yourself!" not quite painful but not really a great feeling either. I was in limbo.

I started pacing back and forth to get my mind off things and of course, to help them along. I was watching my pedometer go up and up. The contractions still came, but the intensity was ebbing.

Eventually, they just stopped coming all together. That was it, ride over. Every one get out. Thanks for choosing the WTF Coaster.

Brian couldn't believe that they were just gone... he kept asking me, calling me every time he had a chance. "Are you sure??" Ugh. Hopes dashed again. Yes, I am sure.

The shitty part about labor is it can go on for days before things really start progressing. The contractions can come and go, even if they are "real" contractions. I can dilate and efface and then just stop for a bit. No, no it's cool. Yeah, I'll just take a breather for a bit. Oh sure it will freak everyone out, that's half the fun.

I was exhausted at this point, so I took a quick little cat nap, and what do you know? It was time for my next shift to start already, so I'm back at work.

I'd say the key word of this experience is frustrating. Simply because I am tired of all the false alarms. I am tired of my body "prepping" lets just get this show on the road already. Remind me I said that when I'm in hour 897946 of labor and still no baby.... we'll see how well I take it.