Friday, May 6, 2011


I'm feeling.. blah, not hungry at all... very tired, and very emotional today.

We went to see my parents today. They sent us some money so we could grab take out from Bandidos (An American-Mexican restaurant in the Midwest- their slogan is "better than authentic!" hahah cracks me up) The food is very good. It's not quite your typical AM fare, but it is pretty similar to what other places have. I just happen to LOVE IT.

I ate really good today- despite not being hungry. I had a 6" Turkey breast & Black forest ham on Honey & Oat bread from Subway. That was with provolone cheese and double spinach and double green pepper. I could barely taste the meat at all. I counted it as 2 servings of veggies. Heck I count every bite as a serving hehe ;)

Then I had an interview. I wasn't crazy about going since its on the other side of town (about 30 minute drive) and it's all under construction over there. The roads are gravel and dusty and the traffic is super backed up. Not to mention they actually had to close down the road for a while, since a semi hit an electric pole and downed electric wires, so they had to call out the police and AEP. Mess.

My interview... did not go well. They asked how long I wanted to work for, and I said about 6-9 months (being pregnant and all, but I didn't tell them that.) Right away they said they weren't interested, and started shuffling me out the door. They asked me why I could only work so short of a span as they are kicking me out of the door and I told them why- I'm pregnant. They were like "ooohhhhh. Well if you want a job after you have the baby give us a call!"

I'm no longer marketable. That made me cry a little as I was leaving. I tried really hard not to bawl. I'm proud of myself for holding it together. It's been really crappy lately with the whole job search, from a rude Victoria's Secret experience, to this one. I'm done. I give up for now lol :)

My parents are trying really hard not to smoke around me, which I am so thankful for. Thanks Mom & Dad. I know its really hard, but I appreciate it so much. They both smoked while my mom was pregnant, and I turned out alright, but still... I like how they respect the fact that I don't smoke, and I don't really mind usually, but prefer not to be around it. We got a lot of smokers in our building too, so I know I won't be 100% smoke free, but less exposure is better, right? :)

My mom and grandma shared their pregnancy stories and it really helped me. But it put things in perspective for me: I'm going to be a mother. Like, forever. As in... I'm really having a baby. And that kind of freaked me out.
It still does. I'm tearing up now. I know its just hormones, and I am not really "scared" as of yet. I know I have a great support system and a wonderful husband. It's just freaky.

Brian's out for a movie right now and that has left me more miserable than I thought possible. He's gone to see movies without me before and normally I'm okay with it. It's usually the video game/comic book movies he goes to see without me. Tonight is Thor. I don't care anything about Thor. The movie started at midnight, but his friends wanted to get great seats so they went at 10:30 (I know, right?! WTF, nerds!! Calm down... you already have tickets!) The movie is probably like 8 months long, so he should be back before I go into labor!

I'm all emo today. I really wish I could stop it, but I know its just hormones. Tomorrow, I'll probably be ravenous, and I'll be back to my annoyingly happy self, but today I'm on the verge of weeping at insurance commercials. Thank god I have Max here, or I'd be going completely bonkers. He's great to cuddle and he is so patient and sweet. Plus, he loves kisses! Speaking of the dog, I gotta go let him out. Let's hope he doesn't have to poo at 2 am.

1 comment:

  1. Maybe I need to get pregnant. I was almost crying at an old episode of Beauty and the Beast yesterday! I only have PMS as an excuse. lol

    Seriously though - Hang in there chika. Keep snuggling with your pup and hang in there. Hugs!

    It's an interesting thought though - to reflect on the type of "mom" you want to be. What does it mean to you? I see you as the non-conventional, adventurous type, which I think would be a fun way to grow up! I imagine a child from that type of home would learn resilance, the strength of family bonds, freedom of creativity, etc.


COMMENT. You know you have an opinion, air it!