Thursday, August 4, 2011

Wednesday Night

Wednesday night was absolutely terrifying for me. I had to run to Brian's work and when I got there, he told me his face was kind of tingly on the left side. "Weird," I said. "Call me if it gets any worse."
 I got a call from Brian two hours later that the left side of his face was numb and so was his left arm. I instantly thought "oh God, it's a stroke."

I told him to go to the ER and I would meet him there. He was a little unsure about going, after all we don't have insurance just yet (we signed up yesterday for it) and we have no money. I didn't care though. My world was crumbling. I really tried to hold it together- but failed miserably.

"Call me when you get to the hospital," I choked out. "I love you, and it's going to be okay."

After I hung up, I sobbed. I took a Xanax immediately, but I still had about 10-20 minutes before it kicked in. I started focusing on the practicalities. I was scheduled to work, so I called in. I called my mom and told her what was going on. Or something similar to what was going on. I think it was pretty much incoherent. She told me to calm down. Stop crying. Explain it slowly. I tried. "It's probably just a panic attack, I used to get them like that all the time. He's healthy. He's okay. You did the right thing making him go. Calm down, it's okay. Just calm down before you drive out there."

I stuffed in my purse the bare essentials: checkbook, wallet, his Xanax, my Xanax, Tylenol, and a book. I went downstairs and knocked on the neighbor's door to see if they could watch my dog. They weren't home. I called Brian's brother. I got a voicemail. "Brian's gone to the ER. I need you to come watch Max. But I can't afford to waste time back tracking. Call me."

He calls me back and says he'll meet me at the hospital.

I get there, and Brian's already in a room talking to a dr. I slide in the room and sit down. They tell him that they are doing blood work and a CT Scan. They've narrowed it down between a panic attack, Bells Palsy, and a stroke, but won't know for sure until they get the results.

So they do blood work and then cart him off for a CT scan. Aaron arrives. "How is he? What's wrong?" I update him and he said that he will take care of the dog if we are stuck in the ER all night long. Brian comes back. "It'll be about 30 minutes before we get the test results back." The nurse informs me.

Aaron sticks around. At this point, Brian's only been there an hour. Shortly after this, the nurse comes back and tells us it's not Bells Palsy (a viral infection) so we are just waiting on the CT Scan. Another lady comes in asking how would we like to pay? Uhh... let me get back to you on that...

At this point, I'm calm. The Xanax has kicked in and I'm thinking logically again. I ask my mom if she can help. The nurse said I didn't have to pay it all tonight, but anything is helpful. My mom can't help. My grandma can. They send me the money. I use my debit card. It's declined. I use my other debit card. It goes through. I remember why I switched banks in the first place.

Still waiting on the scan results, I get a hold of Brian's parents. They offer to come to the ER "No Aaron's already here and it will just upset Brian more if everyone shows up. We'll get the results in a few minutes and I'll keep you updated."

We get the result. NEGATIVE! Hallelujah! It's a panic attack and he's fine. His mom calls. "I want more details on what's going on," she says. "We're coming up." I tell her that it turns out its nothing he was just having a panic attack and that everything looks okay on his CT scan and his bloodwork came back negative too. He's fine and they are discharging him now. "Did they look at his neck?" "no they didn't look at his neck. He had a panic attack they are discharging him now."

Aaron went home. We were discharged. We went home. I called everyone and let them know he was okay. He took a Xanax and promptly fell asleep.

It was a very scary 2 hours at the hospital. I finally broke down and started crying at 5 am this morning, just so relieved.

He's doing great today! He's got the day off work and he's living the life. Spoiled rotten :)

And yes Mom, he said I could blog this! Thanks once again to my grandma and to my brother in law, my mom for talking me down, and keeping me a steady rock for Brian during this bizarre time. I'm thankful that I can hug him and kiss him all day long now.

Now we have to follow up with our family dr and double check that everything is okay, which it is, and he promised me he would keep his pills on him so they are always handy for next time. He's bummed we had to pay almost $200 for a panic attack, but I'm just happy he's as crazy as I am lol much better than a stroke, or viral infection, right?? Right.

Anyway, it's all over with and every one is fine, Brian included. Yay!!!!!


  1. Bells Palsy is frickin' horrible. When I first started reading this, I actually wondered if that was going to be the turn out, but I am so glad (for both of you) that it wasn't the case. I got that in middle school and it was one of the worse medical experiences of my entire life.

    Feel better, Brian! Good to know you're both alright. =)

  2. Wow I would have been a puddle, Im so glad he is okay!

  3. I had no idea panic attacks could affect someone like that.... thank goodness your man is alright!!

  4. Wow, I'm so glad he's okay. I remember the panic I felt when I found out my mom had a stroke. You were awesome and knew just what to do. Go you!

  5. You did a great job being his rock, its hard to do when inside we want to scream cry curl up in the corner, and thats exactly how we all feel inside when someone we love is hurting. Now you know my secret when I was strong mommy to you. It was all fake! But hey whatever it takes to get the ones you love through! I am very proud of how you handled it and VERY VERY relieved he is ok!


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