Tuesday, July 12, 2011

I'd Be Lying....

Well I didn't pass the second part of the exam. Luckily I was invited to re-take the exam this Thursday.

I'd be lying if I said that I wasn't sad. I'm actually really really bummed out about it.
I'd be lying if I said that wasn't what I (half) expected... it seemed a little too easy, and I sort of rushed it last minute since I was going out of town....

I'd be lying if I said I was confident I was going to pass this time. I know what I need to do. I need to read and study the guidelines (all 125 pages) and run the simulator until I get them all right. It will be tough work, but I really want this job.

I'd be lying if I said I didn't want it.

Because I do. I want this job so much. I feel like crying. I feel like sleeping, like hiding, like eating chocolate chip cookie dough... but I am not going to. I am going to take a Xanax, go to bed, have sweet dreams, and get up and deal with all of this tomorrow.

Thursday I get to take part 1 again. I know I passed part 1 the first time, but scores don't carry over, so I have to take it again.

I was explaining it to Brian. "It's like the test for your driver's license. Just because you fail it the first time doesn't mean you're a bad driver. It just meant that you were unprepared. You practiced and studied a little harder, and passed it the next time."

And that's true! Brian failed his twice, but he's never had an accident. Me on the other hand... well... I failed the written portion once (and lost my driving test waiver), then I failed the driving portion once... and then I had 3 accidents in a year... so... uhm... I really need to study. I may not be the best example for that analogy!

Anyway... I'm going to watch some Mythbusters and really try not to dwell on this anymore. I feel all funky and not myself at the moment.

3 comments:

  1. Good luck with your 2nd time! I'm sure it was just nerves the first time. They obviously want you if they want you to retake it! Take a deep breath, don't skip breakfast and do it! :)

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  2. You'll make it! I failed my first coding exam, and passed the 2nd time w/ flying colors. I just had to study harder, so I know what you mean! Hang in there! AND GOOD FOR YOU for not using FOOD to "stuff it". :)

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  3. I know you are sad just be happy they will let you take it again read that book over and over and use it while you are taking that test, remember that other job we thought was so easy and when it came to test time we both FREAKED and had to work really hard to pass the test. We both did FINE hang in there love you

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