Officially Disconnected

It's official! I'm disconnected! I boxed up my iPhone, printed off a shipping label, and got it all ready to go for tomorrow! Hurray! It's off to Arizona, where it will be put to use by someone else for at least a while.

Also, I remembered that my dad had a phone through AT&T that he kept, but ended his contract. He went the Tracphone (prepaid) route (much to my mom's delight, I'm sure... one less bill to worry about!) Being the smart girl that I am, I asked my mom if she had the phone still.

See two things happen in our family. 1) We sell anything not nailed to the floor (sometimes we sell that too)  and 2) We tend to hoard electronics. It was a 50/50 shot. She either had it, or she didn't.

Turns out, she had it! And it turns out it was the same phone my husband was wanting to get. No surprise there, because the phone had originally belonged to me. We had matching Sony Ericsson sliders, but we changed providers and then gave one of our phones to my dad to use. The other got sold on eBay. (Sensing a pattern here?) Brian originally wanted to buy the black and orange one he had, but my old blue and silver one is perfect, since he won't have to pay for it.

Which means... drumroll please!... that Brian is letting me sell his phone on eBay. I know!! I'm so proud of him. When I first met him that boy held on to everything... and I mean everything... and he was super organized. Like. he would pack up his XBOX in the original box to take it to his friend's house and stuff. I'm not kidding. Since we've been together, I've broken his "...but we might need it someday" attitude and replaced it with "what other shit can we sell?" So proud.

Picking up the new (old?) phone tomorrow will be a breeze!

Such a busy day though... you have no idea. I have more running around to do before my Presumptive Eligibility meeting on Thursday, I have to mail out a request for Brian to close out his retirement fund from his last job, and I have to mail out my phone. As well as pick up my birth certificate, check out a rocking chair, and get a fireproof safe. Brian also has to call our renter's insurance and inform me that, yes we have moved! All the severe storms we have been having lately is kind of scary, and I don't know if our insurance would cover damage to our building if we didn't tell them we moved (even though we are still paying our monthly premium)

My birth certificate is extremely important. I am a United States citizen but I was born abroad and getting the birth certificate in the first place was a hassle, that means replacing it will easily be twice as hard. So it must be kept safe. This really is upsetting since I have to have copies of it made for a few different government organizations and it's nerve wracking... Bitches best not lose my birth certificate.

My new phone was shipped out today, which is exciting. It's actually an older model that I once again had owned before. I had a Sony Ericsson w300i walkman phone. It was a flip style phone with an mp3 player in it and it's AWESOME. However... as karma would have it... the phone got ruined.
I had spilled some water on a counter when I was living with my parents and didn't clean it up... well my dad's cellphone was plugged in and therefore shorted out when the water hit it. I didn't know that he had plugged in his phone. The next day, I dropped my phone on the street- something I had done on a semi regular basis- and it instantly stopped working. I was so... upset. I spent 3 days trying to repair it, even buying a new screen from China and trying to replace it.

So I bought a new one for $30 on ebay.

Delightfully old school.

This is Brian's new (old) phone: The Sony Ericsson w580i... As you can tell we are huge fans of Sony Ericsson.

Arent they nice?? Drool drool...

Baby Name Game

What I really want is to name my daughter (if I have one) Sabriel after my favorite book of the same name, by Garth Nix.

But here's the rub... I can't really think of a good middle name that fits with it. Sabriel sounds kind of ...exotic. And if you pair it with a more "traditional" middle name it sounds kind of silly.

Sabriel Ann
Sabriel Lee
Sabriel Nichole
Sabriel Elizabeth (I like that one the best)


And then there is  the matter of nicknames (because everyone acquires one) and I don't want people to call her Sab. Maybe she could go by Bri (pronounced Bree)

But then I was thinking, I really like the name Gabrielle. And I hate the nickname Gabby. But she could go by Elle, or Ellie, which is fun!

One thing that I remember growing up. I always hated my full name (Christine) because I thought it sounded "stuffy" but when I hit my 20's I suddenly found myself loving my full name. I thought it sounded very professional.

Ah baby names are hard work. I'm not going to name my kid Apple or Peanut Nougat or whatever, so dont worry about that.

Boy names are just as hard work.

We want to name him Korben, after Korben Dallas, Bruce Willis' character in Fifth Element.

I love the name Korben but I'd rather it be spelled Corben, which is fine by Brian. He could be called Cory, or Ben for short.
Dallas is so the middle name. That's not changing.

There are other names we liked but I can't seem to remember them... There is a list I have somewhere that has "Names we like" and "No F**king Way We are naming the kid that"

There is a boy's list and a girl's list. I still got 7 months to figure it out.

Oh, next week, I can do the Intelligender Test! Hurray! Who's betting on Boy? Who's betting on Girl? Who is betting on Tiny Tadpole that looks slightly less alien this week (Me!)

Also, don't forget to enter my GIVEAWAY. It ends Tues May 31st!!

Unplugged or is that Disconnected?

Hmm so after some thought, I decided on a few things. This month is extremely tight. Like, we are short for rent.

Our rent is considered still on time if we pay by the 3rd. If it's turned in on the 4th, it's an extra $50 on top of rent and an additional $10 per day it's late. If it's not paid by the 10th, you get evicted. Ouch.

So, needless to say, I was panicking.

But it's okay, because I have a plan. or an iPlan.

We have iPhones, naturally. And they are cool. But it occurred to us that we really only use our phones to text, and the occasional phone call. So it seems silly to pay for so much when really, we need so little. We are required to pay $60 for the data plan, on top of our phone/texting plan, which adds up to $160 a month. What I really want to do is cancel AT&T and just get a prepaid phone, but it's too expensive to cancel. The other option is to "downgrade" our phones. If we get basic, AT&T compatible phones and call up AT&T, we can cut out the data package, and maybe some other things, dropping our bill to under $100 a month.

Bonus: Selling the phones will also give us the extra cash we so desperately need for rent.

But here's the "downside"... I will be without a phone for 4-7 days. As in, you cannot get a hold of me. As in... if there were an emergency and Brian was at work I would not be able to get a hold of him. Sure I can email him (he will be keeping his phone until I get my new one) so he will be able to check his email and of course there is skype and instant messaging, so it's not a total loss.

It's weird because I am kind of looking forward to being disconnected from everyone for a while. I am looking forward to not having to answer texts/calls and if you want to get a hold of me, you will have to email me or Facebook me. Ahaha. It's old school with a new school twist.

The iPhone is on eBay now. I purchased the "new" phone. We will see how long it takes me to sell the iPhone, usually they sell like hot cakes (obviously not my first time selling one!) My new phone should be here by June 7.

Scrambling.

Interviews for state aid have been taken care of and so far, everything looks good.

We are well within the realm of receiving aid, but now have to submit lots of documentation. So much documentation.

This has me scrambling as I have to go to a few different agencies to get the required things and it needs to all be compiled in SEVEN DAYS.

No worries though. I'm a champ under pressure. I have a list, I'll be checking it 150000 times and I'll get it all under control.

Brian has to do some scrambling too. They need paychecks for the last 90 days. That's 6 pay periods. We have uhm... half that...

So reprints are in order.

I feel amazingly calm though, despite the urgency needed to get all of this done. The hard part was the interview (and really, that was not hard at all) the easy part is mailing it in.

Wish me luck!

Good Intentions

I have started this blog so many times yet words fail me. That's not true, entirely. I get diarrhea of the keyboard and lose all train of thought. Or really get going with a train of thought but I go back to re-read it and I get tired... so I know you all wont read it.

I don't want to sound whiny or bitchy. Have you noticed? Lately I've been trying my hardest to count my blessings and just be thankful, dammit. Which is not that hard really.

I've been doing what I need to do. And that means applying for state aid. I have several interviews (two lol) set up this week so things are going smoothly.

I've finally been able to just relax. I've been so stressed out lately it's ridiculous. On top of pregnancy concerns like... appetite aversion and nausea, and my boobies hurting so bad I want to cry. My hormones all out of whack so I cry at stupid shit. Like last week, when I went to my mom's and Goober (the golden retriever) tried to cuddle with me on the day bed but he couldn't get comfy and started wiggling around. He dug his nails into my back on my spine. Normally it wouldn't hurt, I'd yell "get off you stupid cow" and hit him with a pillow, and then my mom would yell at me... but I just cried. And cried. And sobbed. It was really quite pathetic. Even worse, thinking about it now? Crying.

Bah.

Went to a free clinic today for some paperwork and was told I was 8 weeks 4 days pregnant- hurray! This week, baby has ears, eyes, and limbs. As well as elbows. Crazy. Next week, baby will have fully formed and separated fingers and toes, complete with nails! and it's still only this big (    ) It's looking decidedly human, so no fish baby for us.

It's crazy.

My family has been so good to us lately. I'm really thankful for them and so glad that I have them to turn to for advice. Such a long long day today. I am mentally exhausted. It's hard work to be stressed out. I give up on that nonsense for a while. I'm ready to relax. Unfortunately, got a couple of busy days ahead so I won't be able to kick back just yet. I am pretty much determined to do all I can.

Just 1.5 weeks until I can find out what "baby F" is via Intelligender... Maybe I should do a poll?? Bets??  I'm secretly.. well it's no secret... hoping for a boy. Or twins. Haha. Not going to happen. Brian kind of wants a girl. MIL wants a girl. FIL doesn't seem to care... my parents just want a healthy baby. Baby F will be whatever baby F decides to be. I just want to know what colors to paint the nursery! ;)

*GIVEAWAY* Caricatures

I know that i was supposed to post pics of baby clothes today but I am interrupting our previously scheduled blog for this announcement! The first ever GIVEAWAY on He Took My Last Name!

One lucky winner will win a *FREE* family portrait caricature done by my husband, in print quality, to be hung in your living room or wherever it is you people hang things!! How exciting is that? Also everyone who enters will be eligible for a 50% off promo! That's right... I'm whoring out his artistic talent!!

The Rules, Please:

Mandatory Entry
1. You must follow my blog. Leave a comment saying you have done so
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE include an email address where you can be reached so that I can contact you! If none is provided, we will choose another winner!!

You want more chances to win??

1. Follow Brian's blog. Leave me a comment HERE that you have done so
2. Follow me on Twitter! Tweet this message, and leave me a comment that you have done so.
"I entered to win a cartoon caricature from @christiefarrar! Check out http://bit.ly/ikdRPn so you can enter too!"
3. Follow Brian on Twitter, and leave me a comment here that you have done so.
4. Link me up on your blog and come back, leave me a comment and you gain yourself another entry!

Just what am I entering for, anyway?

Glad you asked! You are entering to have your family/friends/pets drawn by my husband, Brian Farrar. The free caricature is limited to 4 subjects (people or pets). The 50% promo requires at least two subjects. Backgrounds are included.

Here are some examples of the caricature work he has done.

The contest will conclude Tuesday, May 31, at 12:00 Midnight EST. One lucky winner will be chosen at random, using random.org number generator, and that will be posted Wednesday, June 1st. Good luck! If you have any questions, feel free to email Brian at befarrar85 @ gmail dot com!!

the 50% off promo code is 50OFFPLS and must be included in your original email to my husband if you want it to count!

I don't know what to make of this blog any more. I mean, it was always a healthy living/weight loss blog with just a little bit of everything else thrown in.

I dont know what to write about any more. I'm obviously not trying to lose weight now that I am pregnant and I am still trying to eat better, especially more now that I am expecting. It's so weird. I feel like I have lost part of my identity. Just hang with me while I try to figure out who this new person is. Not just the one growing inside of me, but the mother I have to become.

Being a mom is something I am ... not looking forward to. I don't know if I will be a 'good' mom or not. I know I will try my hardest to be. What is a good mom? Is a good mom someone who is a great example or is she just someone who provides the best she can, with all the love she can?

I don't know. Maybe both. I'll have to figure it out. I never planned on having children this early, and this pregnancy came at a very difficult time financially. I will just have to do the best that I can do with what I have. I know that everything- in the end- will be alright. I just pray that I am doing the right thing now.

I still havent seen a doctor, and I can't until we get insurance. I just don't have the money to go. But that's okay. I'm focused on health(ier) eating, and taking my prenatal vitamin, drinking lots of water, and getting rest. The exercise I am not doing so well on. Like usual, its hard to multi-task for me. I find my appetite these days lacking, and feeling full faster, and usually nauseous after. I don't vomit, but I do feel really queasy and have to lay down for a while. I tried eating more often, and smaller meals, but somedays it's all I can manage to eat once. I do drink lots of water to stay hydrated. I have been steady at 223 lbs. anywhere from 223-224 for the last week or so, and that's good. I read in Your Pregnancy: Week by Week if a woman is obese she should only gain 15-20 lbs for the pregnancy. I am aiming for the low end (15) since I am already on the high end of obesity, but I won't know for sure until I can get into the doctor. This is why choosing what to eat now is so important. I have to pick healthy foods now, especially since I am not feeling so great, until I am told how much to gain.

I feel like part of me is missing, or maybe it's just become something else? I'm trying hard to figure out what that might be. I don't know. I feel blah... and icky... and... lots of other things. I'm very scared.

I know I'll be alright though, logically. Women have been having babies since the dawn of time, and I am sure if an animal can care for its offspring I will be able to, too. I just got to keep telling myself that.

Brian has today off, and I think I will ask him kindly if he will bring in all the baby stuff so I can take pics of it and upload it. How does that sound? Cheerful, right? Baby clothes make me happy. It will be a picture heavy post, so I am warning you now... better put aside a few moments to look at it all.

Favorite Dinner

My favorite dinner is chicken quesadillas! I love them!

I've got some grilled chicken that I shred/chop (depending on level of laziness- its far easier to shred!) some 'taco flavored' cheese, soft flour tortillas from my favorite company, Mission!, and a little bit of salsa. I don't over do it on the salsa any more... I'm pregnant and my tolerance for spicy food went out the door.

I like to have rice with my chicken quesadillas, too, but I'm far too lazy to make that tonight. It's just going to be cheesy chicken fest for me tonight.

I love the term cheese quesadilla.... doesn't quesadilla itself mean "cheese tortilla"?? lol

A Tub Full of Clothes

I got the baby clothes from my parents' house the other day. My goodness. It's full of baby clothes, mostly for a little boy, but some of it is gender neutral enough for a girl.

I have a car seat now too!

I would show you pictures... but I lost my camera charger and I am so broke right now I can't afford a new one.

I'd take pics on my iPhone but we don't have enough light in the house to make good pics. Not that I am trying to win any blog awards for "best photography ever" but still.

its one of those heavy duty tubs that you put Christmas stuff in, or other storage, completely full to the top of baby clothes.

My mom also bought 125 baby diapers on eBay for $40. So far, we have clothes ranging from 0-12 months, a carseat, and 125 diapers all for $50. Pretty good deal! My dad is going to sand down my old dresser and repaint it for us, so we can have a dresser for the baby.

Things are moving right along for this impending child.

How am I doing? I'm doing really well. I'm holding steady at 223.8 lbs (down from 224.6) and I am battling a queasy stomach some days. Right now, I feel fine. I have been trying to eat smaller meals and more often (good advice, no matter what your status) and it's been working.

I get so tired. I walk up stairs to our apartment and I am beat. 20 stairs!! That's all it takes to leave me huffing and puffing like a wounded buffalo. I can feel a huge difference. Not that I was running up the stairs before, but I was doing 3.5 miles on the elliptical 3 times a week and now I can barely keep my eyes open.

We are doing alright. It sucks because right now money is so so tight... like as in ... pick and choose what bills to pay, can I sell this? and hurry, find all the spare change you can. Luckily our grocery bill plummeted. Brian eats at work, and when he's not eating at work, he's eating cereal. I have things like spaghetti-o's and ravioli, so I am not eating much either. I'm eating more frequently, but lot smaller meals. I just don't have much of an appetite these days.

Brian's doing what he can to pick up more hours at work, and I am doing the same with my work at home job. I wish I could get another part time job... but so far, no such luck. :( Maybe someday.

I called all of our bill companies and told them what was going on financially and we got a lot of leeway so that is good. It helps when you have been on time with a lot of these companies for ages and they understand life has unexpected events. I love it though, when they try to figure out how much you can pay this month, and you say... "Well... I've got $5." and then they are all sympathetic. "You know what, hun, we can just defer your payment this month. It's alright." haha... don't do it every month though.

I'm not gripin', honestly. I know that times are tough, and that we will pull through. Little things make me happy. Like my dog finally wagging his tail. Like a tub full of baby clothes. Like a carseat. A free crib. You know, things like that :)

Glasses

My screw in my eyeglasses came loose. Brian and I decided to fix it, except we didn't have an eyeglass screwdriver, so we bought one ($2.01) The screw in my glasses is so tiny, it's tinier than this hyphen here - and it was supposed to fit through 3 equally microscopic holes. Brian tried to fix it, but the whole screw came out (remember it's only this big -) and we spent the better part of an hour trying to put it back in. We also tried to put a longer screw in (the ones that came with the screwdriver kit) but that wouldn't fit either.

Brian had to leave for work. I am blind without my glasses. BLIND. I called Wal-Mart Vision Center and asked if they could repair my glasses. They could. Was it free? Oh yeah. Great, I'll be there lickity-split. I still have my old glasses and put them on, but they made me feel drunk and nauseous. I could see alright, but everything was tilted forward, like I was half-way falling, and they hurt my eyes so much my stomach started churning. Good thing I live about 2 blocks from Wal-Mart. Brian couldn't take me, so I had to go on my own.

I got there no problem, and 5 minutes later, they had fixed my glasses. I took off the old wretched ones and put the new ones on. It feels great being able to see again!

I also got Brian an anniversary card while I was there. I found one I know he will like. It's a little kid with a blanket tied around his shoulders, standing with hands on hips in classic superhero pose. It says something to the effect of him always being my super hero on the outside, and tender & loving on the inside and how I love both sides of him or something.

I can't remember. :( I already signed it and put it in the envelope. LOL I know its a good one because it made me cry reading it.... but truth be told, everything makes me cry these days :)

The Best Baby Buy of All Time

I seriously got the best deal ever! My best friend Kayla had mentioned a friend of hers was looking to sell her baby gear, fast. And it turns out, she was selling it on the cheap! My parents paid the $10 she wanted for it, and they came home with 2 tubs full of baby clothes, ranging from newborn-9 months, as well as bibs, shoes, and maternity clothes. Let's not forget the carseat! It's a Greco, and Winnie the Pooh. She also included a huge book "Your Pregnancy, Week by Week"

All I have are some pics my mom took with her iPhone and sent over to me. I am so excited!! Brian and I are going up on Sunday (our anniversary) to bring home all the baby's new things!

It's kind of sinking in now... Holy sh-- ... I'm having a baby!!

I think its sunk in for Brian too... he kind of freaked out on me last night. He's worried he won't make enough money at his new job to care for us. But he will. I know he will. I told him that I wouldn't have married him if I thought he was a loser, and I know he will provide. I'm not worried at all. I told him that I would stand by him and I needed him to stand by me too. This is going to be hard for both of us, as we have never done anything like this before. We've been together almost 4 years at this point, married for two, so I think we will be alright.

Not to mention all the support we are getting from our families. Geez, they are baby nuts already and I am not even showing! The baby is the size of an orange seed! I think I will be *well* prepared for the baby now- at least with clothes and baby gear. Maybe not for the actual baby... haha! But I am not worried about that right now.

I still would love to get more baby gear and if you people have any... send it my way! (If you want!) I think I'm alright on clothes, but need gear, like crib, bassinet, stroller, diaper bag, baby bottles, bottle warmers, baby everything. Seriously. I'm sure we could work something out :) Email me at groovygirl1140@gmail.com

Sugar High

I went home to visit my parents yesterday. That was the original plan but I actually ended up visiting my entire family, which was nice.

I ate a loooot of sugar though

a frosted soft cookie
a krispy kreme yeast glazed donut
a giant piece of birthday cake
oreos
raspberry danish

I felt so sick :(

the only real food I ate was my mom's homemade hamburger hash which was delicious. it was hamburger, home fries, and cheese... so good.

Telephone Man

I hate the phone. I hate talking to people on the phone. It just... sucks.

I had to make a call today and spent a lot of time being bounced around from one department to another and finally, they told me "call back in a few days"

...what? Are you kidding me?? FINE.

Then I got a call from Walgreens, asking me if I was still interested in an interview?? Uhm... I already had an interview and you told me "you weren't interested". But when I called back, got no answer.

On another note, I don't feel nauseous today. I don't feel hungry or thirsty either. I feel alright, but only just.

I need to go grocery shopping, so sorry, I can't blog long. I know, you are all sad. But don't be! There will be food in the house! :) Brian's been eating pizza every night for the last few nights and not bringing it home! So our groceries will be cheaper, hurray!

BabyFit

I joined Babyfit.com which is the pregnancy website of Sparkpeople.com

It's good so far. I like it. I am not crazy about how many calories it's telling me to eat a day (2500-2800 which is probably 2x as much as I eat now)  I can adjust that though.

So far I've only tracked yesterday and today. Yesterday I came in at a smidge over 1700 calories and today, I'm at 240 (nausea)

I'm not overly crazy about the community though. I didn't do the community on WW either, which is probably why I didn't do so well on it. I'll make an effort to make connections.

I gulped down some ginger ale today and I feel better. I also had some crackers. I still feel like crap, but at least I don't feel like seeing my breakfast again.

Today I weigh 224.6 which is exactly 2.4 lbs down from yesterday. I'm not sure if that is a good thing or not, but at least I am not headed back toward 237.5 again....

I would probably cry if I hit that number again, even if it were pregnancy related.

not feeling good

I've been really blessed so far. 6 weeks into my pregnancy and not a sign of morning sickness. Tender, swollen breasts, lots of cramps, and of course, back-aches (as my body tries to get used to my larger-than-life boobies) but that was the worst of my symptoms.

I kind of still feel like I should be starting my period, any day now...

Except today.

I feel nauseous. I can't even drink water without a queasy feeling washing over me. It almost feels like a panic attack- my whole body goes tingly. My stomach hurts so bad. It feels a lot like I have heartburn. And of course, whenever I get heartburn, my body has an overwhelming desire to purge.

I've been lucky that I haven't had heartburn like that for months and months now... but the feelings are starting to come back.

I stayed in bed until 2 pm today. I don't feel hungry. I don't feel thirsty. I just sipped some more water, and it felt... nasty going down. The thought of taking my prenatal vitamins today is making me gag. I don't do well with vitamins anyway, but I have been taking them religiously since I found out I was preggo.

I think my body is finally telling me "hey! you're knocked up now!"
My mom and my grandma never got sick. My granny said that she wasn't sick until she got pregnant with my dad (he's the youngest) and my mother in law said she was sick all the time. Hmm. I just hope I don't take after my mother in law. She was sick up until delivery.

On a side note, my best friend Kayla has a friend through her church who needs to get rid of all her baby stuff and is selling it to Kayla for on the super cheap. I mean, 2 boxes of clothes, an outside swing (?), and an infant carseat all for $10

TEN DOLLARS.

Hell yeah I'll take it!

My game plan for the day is simple: make Brian go buy me some ginger ale and crackers. Lay in bed. Sleep. Repeat.

As for the summer challenge, I think I'm up .6 lbs. I don't remember. (another symptom of pregnancy, extreme forgetfulness. Gah)

Monday Food Log

Monday I had

a chicken quesadilla and hard taco
chocolate ice cream cone
spaghetti
lots of water
prenatal vitamins... do they count?? lol

I got in 1 serving of veggies from the spaghetti (I made the sauce from scratch) and lots of fiber from the whole wheat noodles.

I didn't track calories yesterday, but that's alright. I didn't eat a lot. I was actually pretty much not hungry. I didn't even suggest the ice cream- that was Brian's idea! I wanted a water, and he wanted to get ice cream after we went for a nice 20 minute walk. I had to sit down through the walk part way, I was getting really fatigued and hot. I guess it was because it was nearly 70 degrees today and I got sunburnt! My face, arms, and legs got it. Whoops. Sunscreen next time.

A pretty good day. I'm checking out your suggestions and hope I'll find one I like soon.

An Important Change

I have been following WW, but there is no real information for pregnancy on the website. There is stuff for nursing moms but not really for me.

Also, since I am pregnant and will very soon (in 8 months) have another mouth to feed and more importantly, a bottom to cover with diapers, I am going to have to cancel my WW account. The extra $20 a month could buy a couple of packages of diapers.

Part of being a responsible adult means making choices. Part of being a responsible parent means making sacrifices. I'm aiming for somewhere in the middle. I'm giving up a program that I believe works because I need the money to provide for the life growing inside of me.

I'm putting aside my wants and needs for that of my unborn child. I feel like a saint! Hahaha.

Besides- everyone knows the secret to a happy healthy body is eating more fruit/veggies and less blah foods.

The weight gain is a little depressing each week. Even when I track all week and track honestly, I'm still gaining. I think it's definitely pregnancy related and therefore it seems silly to me to pay WW to tell me I gained weight and how to fix it. When I am doing everything according to plan.

So I cancelled my account and I have until 5/27/11 before eTools is no longer available to me. One of the options for leaving was "I'm pregnant" so obviously this is not the first time someone has left WW due to impending baby.

So what is the new plan?

The Pregnancy Plan

1. Exercise for 30 minutes every day, even if it is just walking the dog. Can be broken into chunks, ie 20 min dog walk, 10 min stationary bike. 
2. Get 8 hours of sleep every night
3. Drink 8-8 glasses of water every day
4. Take my prenatal vitamins, 2 twice daily (4 total)
5. Aim for 3 servings of fruit this week. Increase incrementally. 
6. Aim for 5 servings of veggies this week. Increase incrementally.
7. Count calories on foods. WW meals are still acceptable
8. Cook more at home. It tastes better anyway

Numbers 5 & 6 are going to be increased by one weekly, until I can force myself to eat more fruit/veggies per day. I think this will be by far the most challenging, but I know I can do it. Just as I summoned my courage last night, I will summon it to tackle the daunting task of learning to eat right.

I guess I will go back to My Fitness Pal or Lose it! ... which do you guys prefer?

Ready

I love Brian and I love spending time with Brian. I love everything we do together.... but man is he a siphon! I have zero desire to do anything that requires leaving his side. I am sure that is how I ended up with child, but that's not exactly the point. I have no desire to work out. I have no desire to track. No desire to clean the house or cook a fancy meal. I have no desire to get dressed or to do my hair/makeup or to even take a shower.

I just want to cuddle. 24/7. To the point that if we are in separate rooms, I get antsy. Angry. Defensive.

I'm ready for him to go back to work.

I'm ready for some me time again.

I'm ready to start going to the fitness center and getting on the elliptical. I'm ready to spend hours doing hair and makeup for the hell of it. I'm ready to clean the house and cook a meal "because Brian will be home soon"

I really miss those days.

Tuesday, he starts work. 3.5 hours.

He tells me he will go to the fitness center with me, and bless him, he does if I ask. But it's just not the same. I can't get into the zone with him there. He doesn't like to work out and he lifts weights for maybe 10 minutes and then plays on his phone the whole time.

To give the man a lot of credit, he does get me out of the house a lot. And we do lots of fun things together. We have a lot of similar hobbies... its just I sort of forget why I am on this journey of healthy living (can't call it weight loss any more... Not supposed to lose weight when you're pregnant!)

It's almost Monday now.


We had kind of a scare today in our apartment. We live on the third floor in the front of the building. A lady started screaming and yelling as loud as she could, sobbing and shouting "Get off of me!" and "Don't you touch me!" as loud as she could... so naturally I thought she was being raped/beaten and I go out to see what is going on. Brian followed me, of course (thank God) and I find its coming from an apartment on the second floor, in the back of the building (diagonal from us) I summoned all my courage and knocked on the door. A man answers the door. I take in his features as I call into the apartment. "Ma'am? Is everything okay?" The man answered me and said everything was fine. I give him a dirty look that plainly said "I'm not talking to you." I repeated to the woman and she said "No ma'am I am not alright." I asked if she would like me to call the police. Then her story changed. Suddenly she was alright. And she was just scared. I asked her why she was scared but got no answer. I said "if you're sure everything's alright, could you keep it down?" and left.
Our neighbor, who lives right above her, an older grizzled man came running out of his apartment phone in hand. I asked him, "does this happen often?" And he said "no, its the first time. I was about to call the police." I told him we would take care of that, since I had a description of the suspect.

Actually Brian called.
I wrote down their descriptions in case I forgot.
I watched the apartment for the police to arrive.

The man left.

The police came and talked to the lady, I guess. And they left too. They had our apartment number but didn't come to talk to us or anything.

I know I did the right thing by calling the police. One thing I cannot stand is domestic violence. For the man, for being such an asshole. For the woman, for being a dumbass and putting up with that shit. I don't get it. And I don't care. Even if she was 'over-reacting' (over reacting my ass! The woman had a blood curdling scream!) the police still needed to be involved, since she was disturbing the peace. Screaming like her life depended on it and then suddenly changing her tune when I asked to call the police is really fishy to me. >:( But all that can be done has been done. I missed out on my nap.

It was simultaneously the bravest thing and the stupidest thing I have ever done. Brave, because I stood up for what was right. Stupid, because, well.... I'm pregnant and that idiot might have had a gun. I won't be doing it again. And yeah, my door is always locked. Thank God for the police.

A Mother of Mine

Happy Mother's Day to one of my best friends in the whole world, the woman who I am constantly seeking guidance and insight from, whose advice I take to heart (even if I don't quite come around to it right NOW) whose unwavering resolve makes me strive to be like her. A woman who is as kind hearted as she is hard working, who lives a charmed life through rose tinted glasses, who is my unwavering role model, the woman who I want to be.

Happy Mother's Day.

I'd take you out for breakfast Mom but you have Dad to be your slave all day long :)

Mom-to-Be

I'm just now realizing that yes, I am a mom-to-be. I sort of keep waiting for my period to happen, but it's not coming. It's kind of scary, when I think about it. I just wonder... what will my kid be like? Will they take more after me or Brian? I think it depends a lot on whether or not its a boy or a girl. I want a boy... but a healthy baby is more important. Girls have cuter things though...

Baby has already decided if it's going to be a boy or girl. Mom and Dad will just have to wait. 4 and a half more weeks, to be exact.

There is a test called "Intelligender" and it's a urine test that can predict the baby's gender with 90% accuracy- which is about the same as a sonogram, more or less. (Depending on baby's position at the time of the test and the technician's experience and ability to read them)

Intelligender can be taken at 10 weeks. I'll be 6 weeks on Monday. We will know what baby will most likely be- at least 90% sure what baby will be- in 4 ish weeks.

Tomorrow is Mother's Day- Happy Mother's Day to my mom and grandma, and all the other mom's out there.

Next Sunday is our 2nd wedding anniversary- wow that snuck up on me quick! I have to keep reminding myself that it's next week so I don't look like a bad wife. I should just write it in sharpie on my forehead, make things easier on me. Where did the last 2 years go? It went by so fast. Most days I don't even feel like we are married- the reality hasn't sunk in. I keep thinking its a dream I'm going to wake up from. I really hope it's not.

I played the lottery last night. I didn't win. :( So no nanny, new house, or new car for me... Next time maybe.

Stay safe everyone and enjoy your weekend. Try not to get knocked up! :)

Kellogg's FiberPlus Antioxidant Bars

...are my new favorite food! At 3P+ a bar and containing 35% of DRV of fiber, it's a delicious and guilt free snack. The only draw back is the price. $3 for 6 bars... which means if you were to eat 3 of them a day to get all your fiber, it would end up costing you about $45 for the month. Even if you eat 2 a day, that's still $30.

But it might be worth it. Just sayin'. I got the chocolate peanut butter (because, given the option I'm always going to choose chocolate peanut butter... even over white chocolate raspberry!)

Sooo good.

I had 2 of these yesterday, in addition to my spinach and green pepper. Let me tell you what- I was full all day. I had 2 of them for breakfast today too. At 3P+ each, why *wouldn't* you? It's a great tasting way to get some fiber. I wish I could eat these for free, for the rest of my life.

I washed it down with a big ol' glass of pomegranate tea (that I made myself!)

PS- I am also down a whole lb! My boobs are so big now it makes me look skinnier, even though I have gained a little weight. I think it went all to my boobs though. I'm not sure whether to be happy (that its not on my gut) or cry (that I need new bras and I'm growing out of my DDD's FAST!)

:) Have a good day, friends!

Emo

I'm feeling.. blah, not hungry at all... very tired, and very emotional today.

We went to see my parents today. They sent us some money so we could grab take out from Bandidos (An American-Mexican restaurant in the Midwest- their slogan is "better than authentic!" hahah cracks me up) The food is very good. It's not quite your typical AM fare, but it is pretty similar to what other places have. I just happen to LOVE IT.

I ate really good today- despite not being hungry. I had a 6" Turkey breast & Black forest ham on Honey & Oat bread from Subway. That was with provolone cheese and double spinach and double green pepper. I could barely taste the meat at all. I counted it as 2 servings of veggies. Heck I count every bite as a serving hehe ;)

Then I had an interview. I wasn't crazy about going since its on the other side of town (about 30 minute drive) and it's all under construction over there. The roads are gravel and dusty and the traffic is super backed up. Not to mention they actually had to close down the road for a while, since a semi hit an electric pole and downed electric wires, so they had to call out the police and AEP. Mess.

My interview... did not go well. They asked how long I wanted to work for, and I said about 6-9 months (being pregnant and all, but I didn't tell them that.) Right away they said they weren't interested, and started shuffling me out the door. They asked me why I could only work so short of a span as they are kicking me out of the door and I told them why- I'm pregnant. They were like "ooohhhhh. Well if you want a job after you have the baby give us a call!"

I'm no longer marketable. That made me cry a little as I was leaving. I tried really hard not to bawl. I'm proud of myself for holding it together. It's been really crappy lately with the whole job search, from a rude Victoria's Secret experience, to this one. I'm done. I give up for now lol :)

My parents are trying really hard not to smoke around me, which I am so thankful for. Thanks Mom & Dad. I know its really hard, but I appreciate it so much. They both smoked while my mom was pregnant, and I turned out alright, but still... I like how they respect the fact that I don't smoke, and I don't really mind usually, but prefer not to be around it. We got a lot of smokers in our building too, so I know I won't be 100% smoke free, but less exposure is better, right? :)

My mom and grandma shared their pregnancy stories and it really helped me. But it put things in perspective for me: I'm going to be a mother. Like, forever. As in... I'm really having a baby. And that kind of freaked me out.
It still does. I'm tearing up now. I know its just hormones, and I am not really "scared" as of yet. I know I have a great support system and a wonderful husband. It's just freaky.

Brian's out for a movie right now and that has left me more miserable than I thought possible. He's gone to see movies without me before and normally I'm okay with it. It's usually the video game/comic book movies he goes to see without me. Tonight is Thor. I don't care anything about Thor. The movie started at midnight, but his friends wanted to get great seats so they went at 10:30 (I know, right?! WTF, nerds!! Calm down... you already have tickets!) The movie is probably like 8 months long, so he should be back before I go into labor!

I'm all emo today. I really wish I could stop it, but I know its just hormones. Tomorrow, I'll probably be ravenous, and I'll be back to my annoyingly happy self, but today I'm on the verge of weeping at insurance commercials. Thank god I have Max here, or I'd be going completely bonkers. He's great to cuddle and he is so patient and sweet. Plus, he loves kisses! Speaking of the dog, I gotta go let him out. Let's hope he doesn't have to poo at 2 am.

Just How Far Along.... Are You?

Baby calculators confuse me. I don't see why it's calculated from the first day of your last period. How can I be two weeks further along than when ovulation/conception occurred? That's retarded.

I know we conceived on April 11th. I know my estimated due date is Jan 02, 2012. But apparently... that makes me 5 weeks pregnant? Even though it's only been 3. So I guess I'm a little further along than I thought. Only 35 more weeks to go all of a sudden.

Bah.

Also- my brother in law and I had this conversation...

Him: Hey. How's the transition going?
Me: Transition?
Him: the baby
Me: ....."transition??" The transition's going smoothly Captain. If we maintain this velocity, we should intercept the baby in 35 weeks.
Him: LOL I can't believe I'm going to be an uncle. Take care of yourself and the baby. I mean it.

It's cute how excited he is, and still he tries to maintain nonchalant. :)

Baby Registry Bonanza!

Brian and I went to Babies R Us today and updated our registry. I definitely had a lot more fun actually seeing all the products in person. We even picked out furniture! Hahaha... remember, I'm trying to win my registry, and you can help me do that by clicking here! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE help me out lots!! I'm poor, remember?? :) Thank you all so much!! You can play once a day and help me rack up entries. If just 10 of you guys did it, I could have 100 entries in 10 days, so help me help me :) If you guys help me win (may 2-june 27) I will host a super special giveaway!! I already got a great idea for that!

Brian really got into it as we were nearing the toys. He loves baby toys, I guess! Anyway here are some cute pics of things I really like.

I think we are going for a zoo theme, mostly because it's gender-neutral, but mostly because baby animals are effing cute!

This is on our registry

If we have a girl, I'm soooo getting this. It has a canopy!

I love this! They had a motorcycle one for boys too.

This is on the registry!

What an adorable high chair... 

I like this one too!

I love this!

This one is cute too!

this one looks like lamb fleece, but I don't think it really is

Brian wants this carrier! How macho!

I stopped taking pictures after we got the scanner for the registry. Apparently I can only operate one electronic device at a time.

I added a whole lot of diapers and diaper wipes to the list too- buy me diapers!!! I had so much fun. I thought the baby store was going to be overwhelming but it was well laid out and I had a pretty easy time finding everything after I got my bearings. Brian kept saying "what is THIS?" and "why do we need one of THOSE?" and when I looked at formula or bottles he asked me "I thought you were going to breastfeed?" He's so clueless. It's cute.

Babies are Serious Business.

I'm not going to lie. Today I overwhelmed myself with baby possibilities.

I started off looking at which hospital I'd like to have the baby in. But it turns out, almost all of the hospitals in town are owned by Lutheran Health Network and the ones that aren't are on the other side of the city. Which does not sound like a good idea... So really, that pretty much settled it for me.

The birthing suites seem a little... excessive in my opinion. A photography studio next to the nursery? Come on...

Anyway, got a while before I need to worry about that.

Then I started looking up the average cost of birthing a baby. That freaked my shit out. So I quit doing that. That was just silly. I put $250 in savings today. Yep. I actually have a savings!

Then I started looking for giveaways for baby things. Gift cards, baby bags, blah blah blah, whatever anyone was giving away! And I stumbled across Babies R Us... which is so silly, because that is the FIRST place I want to shop!

I started creating the registry but it's a little over whelming. They have a "quick start" option, but it's not working so I have to do it by scratch, category by category... I know I have a while to get it done, but they are doing a sweepstakes where Mom can win her entire registry (up to $5K) and she can enter once a day. Friends and family can play for her to win the registry too. And the more friends I have, the more of a chance I get. I fully plan to whore that out on the blog, so promise me you guys will help! It's only an instant win game  every day, so that won't be hard right?? Right. Thanks a bunch in advance. (I only got a few things in my registry now, I'd like to have all the basics added before I post the link)

Brian and I got a little excited today when we saw a father and infant son wearing matching baseball caps. He thought that was effin' cute and couldn't stop laughing over it. So that's good. He's finally getting excited about the baby now... I think the shock has worn off. He keeps saying things like... "Wouldn't it be amazing to have twins? God I hope my sperm is that awesome!" and "I can't wait to build things out of Legos!!!"

He is also worried a little bit. I can tell, because he will randomly tell me that everything is going to be ok. I'll just be sitting there, playing a game, and he'll tell me "we're going to be fine. Poorer people than us have been having babies." Or "Hell my parents had three kids and they are worse off than we are!" I think he's worried. Ha. Calm down, Daddy. Go take a chill pill.

I have so many things I want to get done! I have no idea where to start. Tomorrow I think I'll visit Babies R Us and get overwhelmed with baby cuteness. It sounds like a good idea. And maybe... a manicure. Oh. Heaven.

I also purchased "What to Expect When You're Expecting". It's my 1st official baby purchase (unless you count the yarn...) so that makes me happy! And I got Brian that "Caveman's Guide" :) <-- I just purchased that, like... now! Ha.

Okay, I'm going back to my baby blanket. I'm almost ready to add the third color! Once I get the first three stripes done, then I will post a pic.

Best Baby Books Ever

I found a baby book for both Brian and I.

Here's his

and here is mine

Both of them are written in a humorous tone, which always helps. I could not stop laughing at the "Let's Panic" book and Brian seemed to enjoy the "Caveman's Guide" which is nice, since he doesn't read much.

He will be reading a lot more! Ha!

We didn't buy either book but we did read a good chunk of them in Barnes and Noble.

I'd like to eventually own both of these books. I've put them on my "list of baby shit to get"

So far the list looks like this

Yarn 3 colors
Baby books
Bras

But I'm still in the early months.

Monday Weigh In: Baby Edition 1

It's the first weigh in since I found out I was pregnant. And its not good. We have been doing a lot of celebrating and that of course means eating out. Yesterday I ate an 8 ounce steak, rice pilaf, AND a whole house salad... obviously its out of control.

I'm insanely bloated. I can feel the water sloshing around in my stomach. I haven't been able to go to the bathroom. I'm irritable.

I'm up 4 lbs.

I'm sure not all of it is food related. After all, I found out I was pregnant on Thursday and its now Monday. There was no way I ate 4 lbs of extra food in those days. That is insane. Especially since I have been mostly tracking.

Part of it is hormones from the pregnancy. I know this because my body is changing in other ways too. My 44DDD's are getting even bigger. They feel stretched. I have acne on my face, neck and other parts of my body (back, bum, etc) that I don't normally get. I feel tired all the time. I don't really feel hungry. I'm crampy.

I am struggling with this whole healthy eating whole foods thing. I just cannot seem to get into it. Even for the baby. I feel like I am failing at this point. It doesn't help seeing a gain on the scale either. But I'll keep doing what I have to. Pushing myself one day at a time until it stops being so hard and then only becomes mildly annoying. If I do it enough, it will become second nature. I hope.

Weight: 223 (+4)

Family Shenanigans

Brian's parents are coming by today. I am making Berry Cobbler. I'm pretty excited because cake + anything = delicious. 16 servings, 4 Points+ per serving, hey that's delicious! I can't wait. What a great way to use up some fruit.

I found that my prenatal vitamins (which are all natural and do not contain any wheat, soy, corn, dairy, etc) have peppermint oil and peppermint leaf in them to help with nausea. Maybe that is why I have been so lucky. Or maybe I'm not at the nauseous stage yet. I don't know. Hope this lasts though.

I find I keep doodling side views of pregnant bellies. Ha!

The cobbler is in the oven as we speak. His parents will probably be here with in the next half hour or so. I am dressed up in that cute size 16 dress I bought

The in laws haven't seen the new apartment. Which doesn't sound so bad- after all, we only moved in the beginning of March. They haven't met Max either... which sounds a little worse, because we got Max in January. Ha! Oh well, my parents havent seen the new place or the new dog.

Gotta go. Family time

Congratulations! for what?

This whole being pregnant thing is funny. People I know are randomly sending me text messages, or emails, or instant messages and they just say "Congrats!" and since I am so newly pregnant, I keep thinking... "for what? I haven't done anything lately....oh RIGHT...baby."

It's a lot of fun though, seeing so many people commenting on things or going "What?! How did I miss this!?" haha

Brian has been asking me all day how I am feeling. And it's probably because I look awful. I keep having these really vivid dreams that have nothing to do with babies, but still keeping me up at night. Like my whole face breaking out in acne and my forehead is so oily that its actually dripping off my head... I have really good skin so I don't get acne often. I've chalked it up to stress/pregnancy. I took a nice 3 hour nap earlier, I really needed it.

My breasts are so tender and they feel completely different. You know when you have a balloon and you stretch it and it looses its elasticity? the skin of the balloon is stretched? That is how they feel. Super stretched. I'm still having cramps too. Tylenol has been my friend, as well as lots of bed rest.

My gramma went to Kohl's today and got us two onesies for the baby. One says I Love My Mommy and the other says I Love My Daddy.

Baby fever has taken firm hold! My mom is now telling random ladies with babies that I am pregnant. Ha! How cute.

Brian's parents are coming over to visit. They haven't seen us since we got Max in January, let alone the new apartment and the fact we are bearing grandchildren now lol I am making the berry cobbler Jaime suggested! Thanks :) I dont know if I have enough frozen fruit, I'm missing about a cup... wondering if I should put in my fresh strawberries? Or you know what... I'll freeze them! Perfect! I'm such a genius.