Funny How Life Works

So in 5 hours, we are headed to the hospital to embark on our latest adventure and newest journey: childbirth. But apparently, life had other plans.

I was commenting how I thought Brian was having panic attacks. He was vomiting and had diarrhea. It's not that uncommon to become physically nauseous when you are overwhelmed... and having a baby is overwhelming.

Turns out, I was wrong (surprise!) I know, I was shocked too. He came home and felt very feverish, so I took his temperature. 99.8. Okay slight fever... no biggie. He slept a bit and I checked his temp every hour, and it got as high as 100.2 but then quickly went back down. Today he's normal. Thank goodness.

He woke up at 6 am and ravenous (a sign of him being normal again....) and we went to Steak n Shake for burgers, fries, and shakes. We decided to leave Max out of his crate, since he has been doing so well lately. I thought, hey, we won't be gone for longer than an hour... no big deal.

We came home and when we walked in the door, we saw it. The destruction. Foam everywhere. From what? Our sofa.

He chewed a big fat hole in the middle of the sofa cushion. The cushion that can't be removed. Siggggh

He knew he did wrong too because as soon as we saw it, he tucked his tail, ducked his head and bolted for his cage. I just locked him up and didn't say a word. Brian tried really hard not to go off... and he managed pretty well. I felt sick to my stomach.

What is wrong with this dog?

So we put all the stuffing back in- we had no choice, otherwise one side of the cushion would be lumpy and the other flat- and we jury rigged a patch with some duct tape and a blanket as a cover. We called an upholstery place (if you live in/near the Ft Wayne area, I'm sure you can guess who we called! They only have the most annoying/pervasive radio ad ever) and got a quote.

$300.

The sofa cost $650 brand new.

We haven't decided whether or not we are going to replace it.

But we know that we are going to be prepared now for kids- they are always sick and destroying your shit!

Anyway, I'll probably be tweeting (nothing tmi) all night and all day until the action happens, so you can follow me at @christiefarrar and Brian's is @befarrar and we will use the hash tag #babyfarrar so you can keep updated if you so choose.

I'm outta here. See ya on the flip side.

Countdown

We are entering the final 24 hours before I am admitted into the hospital. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't counting the minutes as well as the hours. I am so excited!! It's an interesting feeling...

I'm about to meet a complete stranger that I both know everything and nothing about. It's weird.

I've carried him for 9 months. I've heard his heart beat dozens of times. I've felt every kick and twitch. I've counted many of them. I've even seen his picture in black and white. I've seen his little nose. I've seen that he is, in fact, a boy. I've spent months getting all his little clothes ready. I've packed his things for the hospital.

And now, we are going to meet him this weekend.

My tiny little sea monkey is about to become a real baby. A newborn.

Oh it's so exciting!!

I can't wait to meet him. I wonder...

what will he look like?
whose eyes does he have?
what color hair will he have?
what kind of personality will he have?
will he be a happy baby or a cranky one?
what will he grow up to be?
what will be his passions in life?

I'm not really thinking of how labor and delivery will go... yet. I am trying to keep my mind off of it. I've read up on lots of induced labor stories. Some were terrible experiences and others were great, but one thing was common: all ended with happy moms and happy babies. Another thing too, it seems like 12 hours after pitocin was started is about when the baby was born... so that's not terrible. I can handle that. It's a good average... but I am also preparing mentally that it will be longer than that. I am also trying to keep in mind that there is a chance for a c-section too... but I really don't think that will happen to me.

Never hurts to be prepared!

so I stuffed my iPad full of goodies. I downloaded a bunch of books. Some on crochet and some on babies. I got a bunch of free books from the app store. They are children's books that actually read the story to the child, which I think is so cool! :)

I'm loading the iPad up with music. I'm going for some classical/orchestra music. I like film scores and the like... anything without lyrics. It's easier to concentrate on other things with.

23 hours and 57 minutes to go... and counting!

Save the Date!

I had my doctor's appointment today. My cervix is still closed and my due date is Thursday. I jokingly said to the doctor "So you'll be inducing me Friday?" being a smart ass and thinking he would tell me to hold off until after the new year. 

But my doctor was all like "Yeah, I don't have anything planned that day. Would you like to come in Friday morning at 6 am or Thursday evening at 8 pm?" 

Hahahahahaha totally threw me for a loop! I told him I was just kidding and he said we might as well get it over with. I told you he was all laid back and just did whatever. He's kind of crazy, but that's how I like him. 

He explained how the procedure would go. I am to get vaginal suppositories to ripen my cervix. I get three of them over the course of 6 hours (1 every two hours) and after that, they will start me on a pitocin drip. This will start the contractions, and the doctor said I would have the baby Friday afternoon. 

Soooooo

That doesn't leave a whole lot of time to do everything. We are going in Thursday night at 8 and hopefully will have a baby Friday afternoon/evening. We are very excited and nervous! Like, oh my god, we are having the baby this week. This year! Woohoo! 

I feel like we are rushing around a bit and getting some things together last minute... but over all, I feel very prepared. I think Kayla and her husband are going to stay a little bit longer up here so they can meet the baby and hopefully will help us take care of Max too while we are at the hospital. If not, Brian can leave and take care of the dog, and my mom will be there to stay with me. 

I can't believe it's finally happening!! 

Oh, and of course... it snowed today. :) 

Well I have to go finish my laundry and get lunch around. Kayla and her hubster are visiting this afternoon so I need to feed them. 

YAY BABY!!! 

Celebrations

We had a great Christmas, spending it with both of our families. We went to Brian's aunt's lake house and they had a great spread of food and drinks. We ate our fill up and just mingled and chatted with everyone there. Everyone's favorite question: "When are you due?" and when we said "4 days!" their jaws hit the floor. It was great. I got so many compliments (smart of them to compliment a pregnant woman haha) and Brian's great aunt told him he should always keep me knocked up, I looked so great! Hahaha she's a riot, that one.

Everyone was so surprised we came at all, considering we were so close to being due. I was not about to sit at home and let Christmas pass by! So of course we went out!

We spent several hours there, taking in food and drinks (Brian drank enough for the two of us, I had water) and cuddling puppies and small children, meeting more of his extended family, it was great. We left around 7 and headed to my uncle's.

My uncle also had a smorgesborde of delicious food, but by the time we were there, I was hungry again! (That's the beauty of being pregnant- you get hungry every few hours) and there we did a gift exchange.

My grandma got my laptop- we had told her we sold it, as we needed the money. (Totally true, by the way, we sold it to my mom, and we did need the money! Hahaha) she was so happy so that was from all of us for her.
My dad we got him a model plane kit. He likes doing model kits and I thought he had enough cars and could use a plane.
I made my mom a little pouch/cozy for her new iPod she got, and it fit perfectly! I used the actual specs from Apple's website to make it. I even sewed on a button. I know! Crafty.
My uncle and his girlfriend got homemade hot chocolate (great in coffee, and they are both coffee drinkers) and homemade Oreo truffles (because who doesn't like candy?)

Brian got two sweaters and he looks great in both of them, and we got a Bluetooth wireless keyboard for the iPad to share (it will probably be mostly his though!)
I got a great cardigan and a pair of booties. They look like mini Uggs and are so ugly they are cute which is exactly my style. I got a crochet-a-day calendar (well almost, it has 112 patterns for a year) and each day is loose individually so you can keep patterns you like easier. It's really neat! I also got some bath and body stuff. Japanese Cherry Blossom body butter (so luscious!) and shower gel (yay I can smell like a girl again!) and a glitter body spray. I'm not big on glitter but I loved the other two things. I put some butter on my hands and they are still soft, hours later. I day dream of rubbing it on my belly.
My uncle gave me my favorite gift of all time- cash! He knows what Momma needs ;)

We had a great time, eating and drinking (again, Brian drank enough for two of us! lol) and I enjoyed spending time with my family. It was such a great day.

The only downside was my feet swelled up so big but it was worth it :) I was happy to get out of the house and spend some time with family and friends and play with puppies and kiddos and eat a thousand different things... what can I say, I like food :) We got home at 11:15 pm to our puppy and have been cuddling him ever since. It's so nice to be home :)

I hope every one else had a nice Christmas as well :)

Merry Christmas!

And happy celebrate however you celebrate! Whether you are celebrating Christmas or any other religious holiday, or if your tradition is to dance around half naked with a bottle of vodka and a lampshade on your head, more power to you!

Eat, drink and be merry (but don't be stupid about it, be safe!)

I expect everyone to update their blogs with all the goodies that they got!

Wishing you the best,

XOXO

Christie and Brian

Juuuust Kidding!

Oh so tonight I started getting contractions. First they were the little ant hill ones that I could barely feel that I have been having for weeks, apparently. Then they started to get a little stronger- I was at least noticing them without thinking too hard about it. Then they started getting even stronger. The tightness was starting to get uncomfortable.

It was really distracting to work, but I kept on going anyway, making sure to time the contractions as they happened. They were very regular. Lasting about a minute, and always 15 minutes apart.

Then, another hopeful sign that labor might be starting. I had to go. Like, go go. Go poo. A lot. Diarrhea is another sign of early labor starting. Things were looking great, despite the fact I was tied to the toilet now and couldn't work. I logged off and said I'd keep every one updated... if things didn't progress in a few hours, I'd go back to work. If they progressed, well, everyone would get an email.

I'm in the bathroom, fielding questions from Brian, Googling labor signs on my iPad, and trying not to throw up- nausea- another sign of early labor. I'm happy that things are continuing. Contractions are slowly going up the scale of "huh, what was that?" to "omg it's been 15 minutes, here comes another one, brace yourself!" not quite painful but not really a great feeling either. I was in limbo.

I started pacing back and forth to get my mind off things and of course, to help them along. I was watching my pedometer go up and up. The contractions still came, but the intensity was ebbing.

Eventually, they just stopped coming all together. That was it, ride over. Every one get out. Thanks for choosing the WTF Coaster.

Brian couldn't believe that they were just gone... he kept asking me, calling me every time he had a chance. "Are you sure??" Ugh. Hopes dashed again. Yes, I am sure.

The shitty part about labor is it can go on for days before things really start progressing. The contractions can come and go, even if they are "real" contractions. I can dilate and efface and then just stop for a bit. No, no it's cool. Yeah, I'll just take a breather for a bit. Oh sure it will freak everyone out, that's half the fun.

I was exhausted at this point, so I took a quick little cat nap, and what do you know? It was time for my next shift to start already, so I'm back at work.

I'd say the key word of this experience is frustrating. Simply because I am tired of all the false alarms. I am tired of my body "prepping" lets just get this show on the road already. Remind me I said that when I'm in hour 897946 of labor and still no baby.... we'll see how well I take it.

News and Other Bits

Yesterday I officially hit 39 weeks. I didn't have a doctor's appointment, so I decided to hold off on the bump update post until my next one, which is the 27th.

I bought a pedometer for $9! It got average reviews, which is what I was going for. I'm not going to be like crazy power walking woman for a while, I just wanted one that gave me a decent estimation of my waddling.

We were talking to our neighbor downstairs and learned he is moving out next month. :( This is sad, because we really get along with him. We then found out that nearly everyone else in our building is moving out either next week or in the next couple of months. Part of me is thinking "what's that saying about rats and sinking ships?" and part of me is jealous we can't really do the same. Even if we had the money (we don't) we couldn't move because of Brian's transfer. We already live in the closest apartment complex, and we aren't ready financially to rent a house. So here we stay.

6 short days until my due date is here. I wonder if, like the text book pregnancy I have been having, I will go into labor on my due date. Ha. It would be a riot if I did, but I am assuming baby will not be here until he is induced in January and forced out of his happy little home. Time to move out, son! Brian is really sad and frustrated that I have not had the baby for Christmas (although there is still time!) I told him he is just spoiled and he knows if I had any control over when the baby comes, he would be here by now. His response? "Do jumping jacks!" hahaha my ass.

I usually complain about how much I hate Wednesdays, since they are Brian's long night at work. Well, since today is the 23rd, and they are notoriously busy today and tomorrow, they have Brian working 8.5 hours tonight, and 5 hours tomorrow. They close early on Christmas Eve, so that's good. I think Brian is secretly praying I go into labor tonight so he won't have to work so long. I told you he was spoiled!

I finally got sick of waiting to just go into labor at the drop of a hat and taking it "easy". I've been crocheting up a storm and reading all the books I can on crochet. I found a really cool technique that I want to try next, once I finish the afghan. Actually, several cool techniques. In between that, I have been cooking and cleaning.

I hope that everyone has a safe holiday weekend and that you don't get trampled at the store when you go for your last minute gifts and groceries! Be safe on the roads and don't drive like a bunch of idiots trying to make it to Grandma's house on time. Also, make sure that everyone has a glass of wine for me, since I can't have any (still!!!) :P Just one though, I'm a lightweight.

Hyphen-Hyphen-Hyphen

-I woke up last night because my hand had gone numb. Rings were cutting off circulation and my fingers were swollen. Rings were put in jewelry box. :(

-I woke up with mostly normal looking feet today. Still slightly swollen, but much better today.

-I have 4 of the 24 squares done for the baby blanket, or about 15% complete. I need to do 4 squares a day to get it done before my due date. 3.5 squares still need to be completed today.

-I am almost 39 weeks! That's tomorrow. Holy crap!

-I realized that Max is not "my dog" at all. Or even "our dog". He's completely Brian's. And I'm okay with that. He prefers Brian over me in every situation, including feeding him and also taking him potty. Fine by me :) The only annoying bit is when Brian leaves, he goes in his cage and will stay there ALL DAY, and won't come out for anything. Not even treats. He's seriously bumming.

-I get a lot of emails from YouTube now. So many, I had to create a filter in my email to route them to their own folder so I don't get annoyed with them. I got 15 yesterday and so far, 10 today. Blink blink. My most popular video had 9,300 views yesterday. Today it has 10,300. I honestly don't get it.

-The baby likes Kesha. I don't know what to think about that! But if I want to entertain myself, all I have to do is open up Pandora on my iPad and play Kesha to feel the baby wiggle and dance and kick for hours. Actually, the baby likes LMFAO too.

-I made chicken alfredo with whole wheat pasta and then put full fat cheese in it. Hahaha. It balances out, right?
It's easy, delicious, and all mine! Brian's not a huge fan of it, so that makes me want to make it more often so I don't have to share. Gluttony at its finest, folks. I have enough to last me a few more days.

-I think I have figured out what are "contractions" and what are "baby wigglins" but I know my contractions at this point are still USELESS and UNNECESSARY. They don't even hurt. They just feel... weird. Sort of like how your stomach drops when you go down a steep hill mixed with a hint of hmm I think I have to poo.

-Tonight is Brian's "long night" at work. I say it like that because he ended up working just as late last night. Anyway, he won't be home until about midnight. Thank goodness I work most of the night too or I'd end up going bonkers. Wednesdays suck.

-Tomorrow, no plans! We were supposed to go to the doctor's but since we ended up in there on Monday, the doctor pushed back the next appointment until Tuesday, December 27. It will be a lazy day full of crocheting and other such nonsense.

Challenge?

Here are a few words that should never be in the same sentence together "challenge" and "pregnancy" but I like to live dangerously haha

There is a blogger I follow, 12 Million Steps, who just reached his goal of walking 12 million steps. When he first started the blog, he had determined it would take him that many steps to lose weight and be healthy. However his life had other things planned for him. He hit the number of steps but did not make it to his goal.

Completely changing his life this time, starting over in nearly every aspect, he has decided to try again and hit the reset button. He's going to walk 12 million steps... again.

I think it will be a fun challenge, especially since he has no deadline in mind. It's not "I will walk 12 million steps by June 2012" or anything like that. I also think I can join in! After all, walking is free, and I may spend many nights walking the floor with the baby, so why not use a step counter and log it in a spreadsheet?

I want to get back to Weight Watchers when the baby is born so this will fall in nicely with the program too. It's not hard to count steps and I probably won't count it as Activity Points, but it will count for something.

I don't have a step counter yet, but I will be sure to get one. I'm planning on starting the challenge tomorrow, because I walk every day to get a little bit of exercise and keep my sanity. Sure it might not be 10,000 steps a day, more like 500-1,000 but it's still something. In the mean time, there is a step counter on my phone, so I'll be using that, even if it is a little inaccurate.

Data is data!!

So, wish me luck. I might be able to complete this challenge by the time the baby has his first birthday, or his second. We will see!!

Another iPad post

Im on my iPad again so sorry for the lack of my usual structure. Anyway, I am feeling great today. Perhaps it's because I actually slept my normal schedule, or maybe it's because all of the drama of yesterday is over with. I crocheted a total of three squares of my 16 that I need. I can honestly say my mind is at ease now. I think since I have had such an easy pregnancy, the closer to the end I get, the more worried I get about the baby. Insane I know. Last night I had a dream I was standing in front of a very bright light and I could see the baby through my belly and he was fine and perfect and healthy. So obviously, my mind has been telling me it's all okay now and I can just relax. My feet were still swollen and my toes were swollen too. I propped them up with as many pillows as possible and iced them 20 minutes on 20 off for a few hours. They are better today. I'm going to keep them elevated as much as I can. Anyway today is a good day.

An Eventful Day

Was able to see the doctor today. They were able to squeeze me in at 10:30 am. I had not slept all night, and continued to stay awake. I ended up taking the dog out, feeding him, scrubbing dishes, taking a shower, getting dressed, making coffee, making breakfast (bacon and pancakes, yum) and crocheting another square for my afghan. All within 2 hours. I woke Brian up, he got dressed, fed and filled with caffeine and off we were to the doctor's.

I was having panic attacks. I kept trying to tell myself that it was "all in my head" and I was really fine. Sure it hurt to do anything and the puffiness was spreading up my legs, but I'm sure I'm fine.

We get to the doctor and check in. It doesn't take long for us to be seen. She checks my urine for protein- a symptom of preeclamsia- but I'm clean. She takes my blood pressure and once again, I'm clean. She asks if I have swelling anywhere besides my feet- yes, it's moving up my legs and my vagina is swollen. Is that normal? Hmm. She jots down some notes and I'm shown the exam room.

I'm told there will also be a pop-quiz: a pelvic exam! this counts as my appointment for the week.

I get naked and put on my over sized paper towel and sit on the table. I'm starting to feel stupid. Who goes to the doctor for swollen lady bits and feet? Apparently me. Is there anything he can do about it? I doubt it. Why am I wasting every one's time, especially my own? I could be sleeping.

Again, we don't wait long. (apparently, "squeeze me in" really meant "we have ample time to see you today") The doctor and nurse come in and inspect my feet, legs, and lady bits. He presses and pokes and says "yeah that's normal. You can take some diuretics if it's painful to walk." I feel extremely dumb now.

He grabs the doppler and finds the baby's heart beat. A flicker of concern flashes across his normally impassive face. He checks my cervix. Still closed.

"The baby's heart beat is 110 beats a minute. This is in the low side of normal and it concerns me, especially since he has had such a strong heart beat up until now." The baby usually pushes 160. "I'm going to hook you up to the fetal monitor for a while and see what is going on."

My panic levels are through the roof now. We wait another ten minutes or so until they can prep the monitor and move us to a different room.

I'm hooked up, but suddenly we can't find the baby's heart beat. I can't feel him move. I'm trying to be calm. It takes us ten minutes to find the echo of the heart beat, and probably another 5 to find his actual heart beat.  I'm terrified that I am going to be rushed for an emergency c-section at this point.

Finally we find the baby. I'm given a clicker to count his kicks and they also put a contraction monitor on me. I laughed and said I wouldn't need that, I haven't had any contractions. I'm left alone with Brian for 30 minutes while the machine ticks out paper, graphing the heart beat. The heart beat starts out on the low side again (115-120) but by the end of the test, he's pushing out of the high end at 165. I'm trying not to focus on the graph, and just focus on the kicks. I press the button each time. Apparently I'm good at finding the height of his movement.

The nurse came in. "Wow, this looks great!"
The head nurse comes in "Wow, this looks REALLY great! Like, text book perfect."
The doctor comes in. "Everyone keeps saying how great your chart looks, I have to see for myself. Yes, this looks very good indeed."

All three: "Look, you're having contractions. See these little waves?"

Apparently I have been having contractions. What I thought was extra baby wigglings was actually a small contraction. And I get them pretty regularly too. They are "real" contractions, but they just aren't doing anything.

"Unless you go into labor, I'll see you next week. Cancel your appointment for Thursday, we've already done it." the doctor said on his way out.

He's pretty laid back and doesn't really dilly dally much, so it didn't surprise me that he just left the room.

I go back in on the 27th, 2 days before my due date. Weee.

I was able to get a nap in before work. I don't feel quite "rejuvenated" but I feel functional. I feel a lot better that I went in and that there was a reason for my impromptu visit today. I feel silly calling for things that seem like no big deal, but today could have easily been a very big deal. We were half expecting to be sent to the hospital for a c-section.

But all is well, and the baby still hasn't made an appearance (natural, or otherwise) and we keep pluggin' on, thankful that everything is as it should be.

Finished!

It's 7:30 am right now. I haven't been to sleep. My feet have been swollen and puffy for the last couple of days, but it's gotten WAY worse tonight. It actually hurts to walk. No amount of foot propping, icing, and Excedrin will get it to go down. Considering this could be an indication of a serious pregnancy-related condition, I'm calling my doctor when his office opens... in 30 minutes. Sigh.

But despite being hobbled and having my feet propped up all day, I've finally finished my BIL's scarf! Yay! It turned out GREAT and he loved it! He said it was his new favorite scarf. I told him when anyone compliments him on it, tell them I made it. And when they ask if I will make them one too... tell them NO. He got a kick out of that.

Here it is, all done!

I also wanted to make something simple and quick for me, because I have yet to crochet anything for myself. Isn't that interesting? EVERY project I have completed has been for someone else. I have never made anything just for me. I whipped up a quick little headband to keep my bangs out of my face.

And because I am killing some time, I decided to start on the baby blanket. Well, really, it is an afghan. It's the circles to squares one I showed you all yesterday.

Of course, I am doing it in baby colors so, here is the first square completed (it took about 20 minutes)

The pattern itself is pretty simple. Single, half double, and double crochet. The hardest part is counting the stitches to make sure I have the correct number! I have to make 16 of those squares total, then 5 of the bigger ones, and then 3 of the largest squares. So far, I've only got the one, and I need to make 15 more of them the exact same size. For reference, it's a 5.5" square. Lots of measuring and counting.

I'm going to go take a shower to waste a bit of time until I can call the doctor. I'm hoping he will get me in today. I can't ignore the swelling feet any longer. It could be a sudden on-set of preeclampsia. If it's not, and I am just paranoid- good! Better safe than sorry at this point.

84 Percent

84 percent. That's how far I am along in my scarf. I'm almost done. Just 16 more rows, then a border and maybe fringe. And we are done! I am thinking of what my next project could be.

There are a few things I am contemplating. Whether or not I should attempt an afghan, a baby blanket, maybe a doily or two. I really want to do something in the round, and that would work for all of the above projects. Brian also suggested I could make a bag for my iPad. I think if I did that, I'd want it to be in wool, so I could felt it.

I've got yellow, blue, and pale green yarn and a lot of it. That would be perfect for the baby blanket. I also have a whole thing of cotton thread for doilies.

There is also a technique called "interlocking crochet" where one side of a project has one pattern and the other side has a different pattern. It looks like it would be a lot of fun and challenging to figure out. I have lots of spare yarn just for attempting silly things like that too.

I want to use my yarn stash instead of buying new yarn. I'm pretty poor right now, so I couldn't afford new yarn even if I didn't have any to work with. I guess it will be a baby blanket then.

I wonder, should I do motifs? Granny squares? circles to squares? here are my ideas.

For the motif, I'd crochet a bunch of these together in alternating colors, then stitch together to make a blanket.

Or I could go another route, or rather shape, and do this one

Each hexagon would be a different color, and then they would all be sewn together to form a blanket.

Then there is the classic granny square.

Or I could do something like this

This one is done with the same principle as the others, ie make a lot of squares then sew together, but it does bigger pieces and smaller pieces to give it a sort of asymmetrical look about it.  Also it has such fun geometrical shapes! Going from circles to squares!

Any of these would be easy to do, you just whip up a bunch of them in different colors and then slap them all down and stitch them together. I think it would be a lot of fun to try the hexagon one for a unique look. The quatrefoil looks fun too. Actually, they all look fun. I have several hundred yards of each color, so I don't think yarn will be the limiting factor. The limiting factor appears to be me making a decision!

*All images are from Lion Brand's website.

Anyway, I'm going to get some more crocheting done. I want to try and finish it up tonight! I work a lot so in between shifts it's a great way to decompress. I'll be sure to upload the finished project tomorrow and tell you which one I picked. In the mean time though, why don't you tell me which one you think would look neat?

Mrs Popularity

I've been uploading the occasional video to YouTube on my Let's Play the Sims series. I never thought any one would give a shit about it. After all, who wants to watch someone else play a game?

But whatever, I did it (mostly because Brian said I would be good at it) and what do you know? The first episode alone has over 8,300 views. What. The. Hell?

Okay.

Cool. I uploaded a few more episodes (I've done 12 so far) and while none of the others have that many views, I get subscription and comment emails daily. Daily!! I woke up from my all day coma nap to discover I had 12 emails waiting for me from YouTube.

Just now, I got another two comments. My first troll in fact. Wee trolls.

I guess I am popular now, someone has gone out of their way to flame me.

It makes me laugh. I was told "stop swearing you bitch ass cunt!" and "cheaters never prosper, cunt!" Kudos to them for using punctuation. I haven't cheated in the series at all, I mentioned that I was doing this legitimately for the series because when I play on my own, I tend to use the in-game cheats to give my sims lots of money so they don't have to go to work and I can buy them fancy shit.

As for my cussing, well, if you don't like it, don't watch. :) There are plenty of G-rated you tubers out there.
But the best part of it is, I can delete those comments. I love the internet.

PS If you want to come troll me watch my videos, you can do so here

http://www.youtube.com/user/HeTookMyLastName?feature=mhee

What the heck?

On Mythbusters, they often have what they call a "What the hell are we doing?" moment. This is the moment when whatever ridiculous thing they are about to do sets in and they step back and reflect "Oh, this is my life."

I just had one of those.

My gramma, who is really tech savvy, sent me a text message.

"I lost the pattern for the baby blanket, can you look it up for me?"

Sure no problem, gramma. I hop on the computer, find the pattern she was using (because I knew what pattern she was using, weird or what?) and then told her I found it.

"Send it to me on my phone."

I just spent the last 5 minutes copying the instructions word for word into a SMS message to send to my grandma so she could finish my son's baby blanket. What the hell are we doing?

Living in the 21st century!

I can't help but laugh and shake my head. It's amazing what we use technology for. Sure I could have emailed it to her or even printed her off a copy.... but she wanted it on her phone. Which I think is really neat.

Go, Gramma, go!

Week 38: Update

HOLY CRAP I OFFICIALLY HAVE 14 DAYS TIL I AM DUE

No apologies here for the caps, I am that freakin' excited. I really hope the baby comes SOONER rather than later... but whatever!!! I have a deadline in sight.

The doctor's appointment was pretty standard. I had the urine check, the blood pressure check, the weigh in. All good. I actually went down 2 lbs from my last weigh in, which is completely normal at this stage in the game.

I had wondered if I would lose weight, as I noticed I have a lot more limited space in my stomach. As of now, total weight gain for the baby is 33 lbs- completely average!

Then came the pelvic exam. I was so eager to see if I had made any progress.

....

Except I didn't. I didn't even stay at 1 cm dilated. I'm back to 0.

Fully closed. The Labor Express is not stopping at the Cervix Station. Closed for renovations.

I am a little sad. More than a little. I almost cried in the doctor's office as I was getting dressed. But you know, every pregnancy is different and just because I appear to be going backwards instead of forwards, that doesn't mean that it can't all change in a few hours from now or tomorrow. That's the most frustrating part of being pregnant. Even for me, as I am not a control freak, it is very hard to accept that things aren't going the way I had wanted them to. I can only imagine the anguish it would cause someone who was very type A lol :)

Brian and I were making predictions on when the baby would actually make an appearance. He said December 31st, at 11:30 pm. I say January 3rd- result of an induction. But really, it's all up in the air. Like I said he could decide to come now, tomorrow, or next week. There is just no telling with this baby. I do know that he is healthy, he is active, and I am thankful for that. All I can do is my best to relax and focus on other things. Like laundry and finishing up that scarf, napping and cuddling with my pooch. Spending lazy days like this with my husband. Playing Words With Friends and Family Feud on the iPad. Making more videos on YouTube haha.

I haven't taken the bump picture yet. I'm very tired at the moment. The weather is really doing a number on me and it's been a long day, considering I didn't fall asleep until nearly 8 and was up at noon.

Time for a nap!

The Scarf v 2.0

Remind me why I agreed to making my brother in law a scarf? Oh yeah, because I can't say no.

Also I'm sure part of it was because how much he gushed he loved Brian's scarf and as you know, flattery gets you everywhere!

The first attempt was just that... an attempt. It was going okay until I sat back and looked at it. The constant yarn changes made it look like it had tassels on one side and I think because of that, I forgot the first rule in crocheting: count your stitches.

Every row seemed to have more and more stitches. Finally, I noticed that my scarf was getting wider and wider.... but since I had been cutting and knotting the yarn every 2 rows, there was no way I could rip it out and start over easily.

It will make a nice washcloth. Lol.

I know there were three things I did wrong with it before.

1) I forgot to count my stitches. This means EVERY row. It's not the first row that is the issue, it's the row that is somewhere in the middle. I started with 32 stitches at the bottom. At the top? I ended up with 41. That means somewhere along the lines, I added 9 additional stitches, causing it to get wider at the top.

2) I didn't use stitch markers for the specialty stitches. This isn't really required for every crocheter. Just the ones like me who have trouble visualizing where things go. This one sort of goes hand in hand with the counting stitches; it's to make sure I am not adding any additional stitches, special or not. It's a little hard to see, but you can tell the pattern isn't straight down in a line.

3) I made it too complicated. The color changes are something I am not so good at, so of course I was clumsy and over-thinking the solution. The color change happens every two rows and only on the left hand side (right hand side if you are a righty). I was cutting the yarn and weaving in ends every 5 minutes. I was clumsy and butterfingers trying to hold on to the cut yarn and the new yarn at the same time.

My only option at this point was to start completely over. I couldn't even unravel the yarn, so it's pretty much wasted. Bummer-rama. No point in crying over spilled milk, so I got started on the second attempt. Version 2.0 I have been calling it.

Here's how I am fixing my mistakes:

1.) I read the pattern and counted out 19 completed stitches per row. So each row, as I crochet, I count the completed stitches. When I make it to the end of the row, I count the stitches again. If there is any number other than 19, the row gets ripped out and started over again until there is 19 stitches. Usually, I end up skipping a stitch or putting 2 stitches in one hole.

2.) I got out my fancy stitch markers and I counted out how many stitches down the row it took to get to the first specialty stitch. Then I placed a marker for each one. Each time I complete the specialty row, I move the markers up. It doesn't matter that I know what stitch they are on, it helps me look at a glance that I am keeping everything in line. Which is essential for a pattern.

3.) To keep my yarn changes as simple as possible, I went on YouTube and various crocheting resources and looked up how to "carry" yarn. Carrying yarn is where you don't cut it off after you've used it, that way it keeps the number of loose ends to a minimum. I am leaving both balls of yarn attached and switching every two rows. It takes a little bit of practice and looks a bit odd... but it's so much easier.

The pattern is a lot easier to see and also straight!

I also decided that I should probably know how wide my scarf is and how long I plan on making it. I measured its width and came up with 6 inches. The length is about 17 inches. I have 17 stripes, or 34 rows. It takes me approximately 5 minutes to do 2 rows. Each 2 rows equals about an inch.

Since this sort of falls into the category of "skinny" scarf, it also has to be a little long. Brian's brother gets annoyed when his scarves are too long. He claims he ends up tucking them under his armpit haha! So Brian will be my test subject...once again. Poor Brian. I think it needs to be about 4 feet long, or 48 inches. Most scarves are anywhere from 60-72 inches in length. It should take me an additional 3 hours to get the required length. Give or take.

I think I found my hobby. I find myself reading and browsing patterns all the time. I love looking at crochet books and trying new techniques. I like Googling resources to figure out my crochet conundrums. I really enjoy all aspects of it. I'm even reading a murder mystery series about crochet. I don't even really like murder mysteries. Yet, I can so relate to the main character. About not feeling like I've got the hang of crochet, but I don't really care because I am so addicted to it. That I have waaaay to much yarn for as little projects as I have completed. The feeling of immense self satisfaction at finishing ANYTHING.

Anyway, I only took a break from crocheting so I could remember to upload the pictures I had taken and get this blog published. Now it's time for a quick bite to eat and back to the grindstone. I really want to get this completed before I have the baby. Hurry hurry...

Er, Okay?

Yesterday, someone knocked on the apartment door. I was in the bedroom, in the back of the apartment. I waddled to the door to see who it was.... but they were gone. Today, Brian got an email from the apartment office saying that "maintenance has placed your request to fix the dish washing machine on hold due to the following reason: unable to enter unit." WTF.

They knocked one time. And not a knock knock knock! but a Knock. Just one. And then they were gone. 

Secondly, "not able to enter unit" my ass. The maintenance guys all have keys to the apartments. I know this because they have come in several times with our door locked before to fix things. So... wtf.

Did they just not want to fix our dishwasher or something? I told Brian to call and complain (because when a man complains, things get fixed faster) but so far, he's decided to hold off on it. 

Our next door neighbors moved out so maintenance is all up in our building getting it ready for the next potential tenants. This includes a lot of hammering....which I can hear and it wakes me up. Bahhhhh fine. That's alright. I'm not sure what needs so much hammering (it goes on for hours!) but that's not the problem.

The problem is the toxic smell wafting in the hall way and permeating our apartment. Whatever they are using to clean the apartment is pretty... strong. Let's go with strong. I don't know if there is mold in that apartment or what, but if I can smell it inside my apartment, I really don't want to be in their apartment! 

Combine weird chemical smell with our downstairs neighbor's love for cooking. I think he is making some sort of pork roast or something. On its own it would smell delicious (like all his dishes) but with the weird chemical aroma it makes it seem like some sort of science experiment about to go horribly wrong. 

Ah, apartment life. 

I'm glad I don't have to fix the dishwasher. And if they don't want to fix it, fine. I don't care. I don't mind that they are doing so much work on the building or the unit either. It means that they actually give a shit about the condition of the building when they work and scrub and freaking hammer for 6 hours straight. 

I'm still not sure what that guy is hammering. Here's what it appears is happening in the apartment next door. 

Guy #1: I'm just going to beat this hammer against random walls.

Guy #2: Good idea, meanwhile, I'll mix ammonia and bleach!

Guy 1: Yeah that should prove we are working hard.

Guy 2: Hmm what are all the fumes for?!?!

Guy 1: I can't hear you over my hammering.

Guy 2: No worries, it's cool. 

Oh... interesting. This just in! Brian just got an email from the apartment. Our request to have our dishwasher fixed ...was completed! Hurray! Wait, what? Oh... Hmm. Apparently- they called my number twice and left me 2 voicemails. I neither have missed calls nor voice mails. Hahahah

I don't want it fixed. Just go away.

Bass Ackwards

My sleeping pattern is so ass backwards it is now bass ackwards. I did not fall asleep until noon today- NOON- and I was in bed by 4 am. I just couldn't sleep.

I feel like I am all mixed up. My night is day and my day is night. The positives? I don't really care that I am sleeping all day and up all night. Perfect for baby.... right??

Also I seem to be really productive when insomnia hits. I read 2 entire books. One was a crochet murder mystery (I know, geeky!) and the other was a book on vintage crochet. Sigh, it was so beautiful looking at all the old patterns from the 1920's-50's. And all the ugly colors haha

Feeling inspired, I crocheted. I'm making amazing progress on my brother in law's scarf and I am actually excited to show it off but I will have to find my camera first and also my measuring tape.

I used the baby kick counter in my pregnancy app. The baby is healthy and active enough if it kicks 10 times in 2 hours (source) but apparently my kid is an overachiever, because he kicked 10 times in just under 3 minutes. So yay!

I typically work evening hours anyway so it's not a big deal if I sleep from noon to 7 or 8 at night when my shift actually starts. I know, be jealous.

I'm experiencing a fun, new pregnancy pain! My lower back twinges. With sharp shooting, oh my god did someone just knife me?! kind of pain.

So I just ice it and lay in bed anyway. Meh.

Oh, and I drool now. No joke. It just uhm sort of happens. Especially during sleep. I wake up because I nearly drown in my own soggy pillow. I guess it's pretty common, though its more common in the first trimester and not the last 3 weeks.... but every pregnancy is different. Your results may vary.

My breasts and nipples are very ....temperature sensitive now. That's as nice as I can say it. Let's just say I get really cranky when it's cold. Because it hurts. I'm considering walking around with those hand warmer packs in my bra. I wish I were kidding.

Haven't had any more contractions. Water hasn't broken. Got 15 days (?!?!????!!!@$%) left until my due date. Golly gee willickers, that was a fast year. HOLY CRAP Christmas is in 11 days?!?!

*dies*

I guess it doesn't really feel like the holiday season because I am more focused on the arrival of my baby it hasn't even snowed yet! We had a little patchy cover then it just... went away. Awesome. Please don't be a blizzard when I give birth or come home from the hospital with my newborn. Because that would require more Xanax than I think I am allowed to take.


I'm a little loopy. So I am going to force my husband to let me wander around the grocery store aimlessly at 2 am because I am going stir crazy. Also I want a milk shake. Mmm.

Never Mind

Well I was supposed to go to the doctor's today, but at 9 am, I got a call from the office saying that the doctor had to go and perform an emergency c-section so my appointment was canceled. I rescheduled it for the normal day and time- Thursday at 1:30 pm.

I don't have a week 37 doctor's appointment but that's alright. I'm back to my normal schedule of Thursdays and that will bring me to week 38. Which includes a pelvic. Weeee.

Anyway, I hope the emergency c-section went alright for both mom and baby and that everyone came out of that one okay. It's a scary thing to face the knife, and I am sure it's terrifying to have to face it quite suddenly and unexpectedly.

It reminds me how lucky I am to have such a normal pregnancy with no complications. I am really thankful I wasn't the one under the knife today. I know I complain about being pregnant a lot, but this really hits it home how grateful I am that I am only sore tired and cranky. My baby is perfectly healthy and so am I. I really can't ask for any thing more than that.

I feel a lot better today- almost back to normal. I made Brian his favorite dinner in the whole world last night! I made chicken parmesan. I've never shallow fried anything before, so it was a fun and exciting experience to try it out. I breaded up some chicken thighs and shallow fried them in the skillet for about 4 minutes per side, then I spooned some spaghetti sauce and cheese over them and put them under the broiler for 3 minutes- again, I've never used the broiler (with any success!) so I was pleasantly surprised when the whole meal turned out great!

He brought home some garlic bread with cheese too! Yum!

As I was cooking, I was thinking of how spoiled my kid is going to be. Sure not every day is going to be chicken parm, and there will be hot dogs with mac & cheese days, but one of my favorite memories growing up is my mom cooking a big meal for us to enjoy. I can't wait to carry on that tradition.

I'm totally in the mood for fried chicken, mashed potatoes, and biscuits.

I think the baby wants it too, now he's kicking up a storm! :) It's healthy if you don't drink soda with your meal right? As long as you drink water with your meals? Hahahaha... ok, maybe not. But I can dream right? And then ask Brian politely if we can hit up the KFC later for lunch :) Won't be as good as my mom's but I am sure that it is easier :)

Maintenance is supposed to be coming by sometime today and taking a look at our dishwasher. Brian called them Friday and they said they would get to us today. So far, nothing. Meh. I tried going back to sleep but I'm all wound up now and can't seem to relax. Also it doesn't help that Brian doesn't want to come back to bed so I don't have anyone to cuddle :( Even the dog isn't tired. Hahaha.

Stress, Party of Two

Okay, it's no secret that Brian and I are really disappointed we haven't had the baby yet. This has led to stress on both of our parts. We are stuck playing the "waiting game". Patience isn't my strong suit. I've checked out mentally and emotionally for a few days now. I'm either up all night or in a coma, somehow trying to cope with this ....ineffectively, it seems.

Brian on the other hand, is freaking out that I will go into labor while he is at work and he won't make it home in time for me to have the baby and we will have it at home or in the car or something. Because that is something he can't control (short of taking time off work until the baby is born) he has decided to set his sights and his stress on something else:

Our financial state.

As if that makes everything better. It doesn't. Sigh. So, I will humor him and walk him through everything. See, he was doing great, being involved and he was fine. Then he drops out of the loop again (not my fault, I keep trying to get him engaged in it) and then he freaks out because suddenly he doesn't know anything. Uhm. How is this helping? If he's removed from the situation completely, he has panic attacks and then we end up in the ER and ... well... never mind.

He's home from work in an hour and now I am going through our debt list, our budget spreadsheet, and our online accounts to make sure everything is up to date in our data spreadsheet so I can show him how things are going. Hopefully that will give him a little peace of mind. I'm actually not stressed about our financial state. Sure it sucks! but everyone's does. So. No worries!

And hopefully, it will give me the mental stimulation I need to be engaged again in daily activities. It almost feels like I am suffering from depression. A Xanax and maybe a little change of scenery will help me out a bit. It doesn't help him any when I am like this. He has no idea what to do. (the answer is simple: crush up my happy pills and make a smoothie out of them! Preferably chocolate or peanut butter.)

Part of me knows the reason he is freaking out like this is because it's just how men handle becoming fathers. They worry if they can provide. It's hard wired into them. Part of me also realizes that when I am not my best self, he really stresses out and wonders if it's his fault some how. It isn't. And I know I am acting out of character because I keep getting asked if I am alright. I'm okay. But just okay.

Maybe I will do something nice for Brian to let him know that even though I am not quite myself this past week, I still appreciate everything he does for me. Sometimes words aren't enough and even though I tell him all the time how great and wonderful he is, he may think I am just doing lip service right now. Hmm... what to do?  Oh, great idea! thanks, brain. I knew you would come up with something good.

to Brian

"Bring home garlic bread. Don't eat. I'm making you dinner. I promise you will love it."

Weeee time to get in the kitchen. See ya!

The Walking Dead

Ye Gods am I tired.

I must be in training for being a mom or something.

That's the only explanation I can come up with. I am all out of whack with my sleeping pattern. Some days I sleep all day and can't seem to stay awake. Other days I can't seem to sleep. Rinse, repeat, reuse and recycle.

Bah. I'm considering taking a sleeping pill on the days I can't sleep just so I can get back on a semi normal schedule. Did you know most days I stay up until 8 am? that's insane... even for this night owl. I don't know if it's a secret fear or paranoia of going into labor while I'm sleeping that is keeping me up, or if I just got my schedule out of whack.

Today was really hard to stay awake all day. I tried so so hard that way I would fall asleep at a more reasonable hour of 4 am (quite normal for us) instead of at 8 am like I did today. I was up at noon. I know... I am a freak of nature, lol can't help it though.

The day before though I could hardly get out of bed. I actually slept most of the day away, and only got up twice to go to the bathroom. I didn't even eat until it was after dark.

This can't go on. I need a normal schedule. I don't have any sleeping pills here. I just have NyQuil, which I can't take. I will have to run out and get some I guess. I won't have any trouble sleeping tonight. I am on the verge of falling asleep at the drop of a hat. I am day dreaming about sleep.

Get used to no sleep... I know.

I totally understand.

I feel functional. I can do basic things, like breathe, eat, and remember to wipe the drool off of my face. But I am lacking in performance, definitely.

Do you know how many typos I've had already? Thank God for Google Chrome and its spellchecker :)

I am looking forward to my pillow tonight. Do you think it's considered cheating if I talk dirty to it? Oh pillow, I love the way you caress my face, you know just how to make me feel at peace... and your friend, jersey sheets, ooh the two of you conform to every curve of my body.

lol now I am just getting silly.

Sorry. Nighty nightie night night.

Weee!

Today is my mom's birthday! Hurray!

I love December because it is always a whirlwind of family events. First there is my mom's birthday. Then, just 2 short weeks later, it's Christmas. Then it's my dad's birthday/New Year's.

This year, the holidays are going to get a little tighter and a little more jam packed because somewhere in the midst of all of that? Our baby will be born! So that will make each year more fun and challenging (how the hell am I supposed to buy gifts for that many people??) I love the Christmas season and absolutely enjoy all the crazy get togethers and the insane amount of time and energy spent with relatives and on food and presents. It's great.

I have no idea what's the haps today, other than the fact that we are visiting them for a little birthday fun.

~*~

In other, wonderful news! I finished Brian's fugly lovely scarf! It took me nearly two months to complete, but it's done! Wooo!! He looks so handsome, doesn't he? Thrilled to be wearing it, right? See the pained look of "I'm doing this for you" in his eyes?

Yeah me too... but wouldn't you know it! Once he actually wore it outside and noticed how warm he was with it, suddenly it's the best scarf in the WORLD! (It is wool, for crying out loud!)


The only problem? His brother wants one too. Uhm. Wait, what? He wants a scarf. For Christmas. Which is in TWO WEEKS. I told him no. I'm not making him a scarf. No no no no no. No.

....In completely unrelated news, I am working on a new scarf. This time it's in his brother's favorite colors because I can't say no struck a compromise. No popcorn stitch, pattern of my choosing, as long as it has two colors, black and purple.

I chose a relatively simple pattern using double crochet and triple crochet, so it works up quickly. I started it last night (after I ran to the store at 4 am to get purple yarn!) and I am already a good 4 or 5 inches into it and have only been working on it an hour. This should totally be done by Christmas! Actually, I was given permission to take longer than Christmas as long as it was "still winter" when I gave it to him. It's Indiana so it will still be winter in June. :P

Seriously though, provided I don't have the baby uhm today, it should be done before Christmas.


Well I've wasted enough time blabbing about things that only I seem to think are amusing (isn't that always the case with my blog?) so I will finish getting ready to head to Meemaw's house for some fun and festivities weeee! (Meemaw is my mom's pet name for "grandma" because it sounds... cool, right? Right. Riiiiiight.)

Dropped.

Yes it's totally noticeable that the baby has dropped. My profile looks different now! Also... I waddle.

But just because I've dropped doesn't mean I am going into labor any time soon. Could be anywhere from oh say now to four weeks from now. Welcome to the waiting game folks.

My belly feels different now. I feel... flatter. Flabbier. In fact, I can pinch skin I haven't been able to pinch for the last 4 months. So I am battling a sort of distorted mentality. "God, I just look fat now! Not pregnant!" but that is quickly stopped, as I tell myself to shut up, I am still obviously pregnant.

I can breathe easier. I feel more stable, on the contrary to what other moms to be feel. I have a shitty sense of balance any way, so the lower the belly is the better. It keeps my center of gravity low. I can get up and down easier (again, thanks to the lower center of gravity) and I don't need to sleep with my pregnancy wedge! I can even *roll over.* Uh, yeah. I'm thrilled about that one.

On the other hand, it's much more uncomfortable to sit and walk. It feels like the baby is really wedged between my pelvis (uh, isn't that what it is?)

I've been reading up on the last chapter of pregnancy in What to Expect When You're Expecting because, well, it's time! The only thing left to load up still is my iPad!

Brian is getting very anxious... he's almost getting to the point of annoyance and frustration. It's interesting to see him acting this way because he is normally so laid back and doesn't get annoyed by much. I think he is really eager to meet his child. He came home from work today, dropped to his knees, and kissed my belly, telling the baby he was home for the day. I laughed and laughed... it's funny and cute and a little awkward (uhm, hello to you too?) then he started talking into my belly button in case it made the baby hear him better.

...what?

....okay.

It's sweet, if a little odd.

Monday is the official appointment day. I hope that I get an exam, but I don't know if I will or not. I wasn't scheduled for one this week, but since I ended up in the hospital and dilating... well I might get checked just in case.

Twenty days to go. Hopefully less than that. I'm not really much for the duck waddle I've got going on. And my freezer isn't going to stay stocked for 20 days!

Week 37: Bump Update

I'm considered full term today!

The little baby under the text is actually a movable 3D image and plays a fetal heartbeat.

And I think the baby was pretty damned determined to let me know that because from 2 am to 5 am, I had strong, regular, INTENSE contractions. Not quite "fall to your knees screaming WHY GOD WHY" painful (as everyone has told me they will get) but intense enough I couldn't walk while I was having one. I had to do a lot of breathing and it really helped that Brian made me laugh so much.... even though it hurt like hell to laugh in the middle of a contraction. I started to get nauseous whenever I was having one (a common feeling, thanks, Google!) I was just about to go to the hospital at 5 am... when all of a sudden, the contractions stopped! and I didn't have another one all day. I was pretty paranoid to fall asleep, and didn't end up closing my eyes until 8 am. I got up at noon.

I had a hair and nail appointment today. Brian's cousin, who was doing our hair, was joking around with me that she didn't know what she would do if my water broke while I was there. I told her she'd finish my hair ;)

I also think the baby is sitting a little lower this week. Suddenly, it's easier to get in and out of bed, I can breathe a little deeper/easier, and I constantly feel a little more pressure on my hips/pelvis. What do you guys think? Brian said I don't look as big as I did last week:

Last week- 36 weeks

This week- 37 weeks

I definitely feel bigger than I was last week! Hahaha... I guess every week I am a little more pregnant :)

No doctor's notes today- I didn't have an appointment because he was out of office. That will come Monday. I will probably be violated checked for any more progress, since I will be 37 weeks and 4 days, one full week after the visit to the hospital.

(L and) D-Day is fast approaching.... any time between oh... NOW and 21 days from now! When I logged into Baby Center this morning to read my weekly update, the first thing it said was

Welcome to the waiting game.

Yeah, no joke. Thanks for that. 

The dog is terrified of me. He won't even look at me. It's as if he knows... something... is very...very... different... about this woman. Lol cracks me up that he runs from me every time I enter a room. He sees me and you can just see it in his eyes " OH GOD ITS THAT WOMAN AGAIN RUN AWAAAAAAY"

...Do you think he knows? Hahahah. I chase him around too! Max come baaaaack! It's my new favorite past time.

Good News!

As you might remember, Brian put in for a transfer to the new store opening up. Well we got some good news on that front: He got in.

Also some extra information-

First, the new store is what they call a "DELCO" which means its a delivery and carry out store only- no dining in option.

Secondly, he is one of 2 full time drivers.

Third, the new store took over the delivery area of one store completely, and parts of two other stores. The delivery area is huge!

The store will be opening up sometime in January! We are really excited because it means he will be closer to home, he will not have to use as much gas, and he will probably make a LOT more in tips, considering the store is going to be mostly delivery with a huge delivery area. This is so exciting!

Could you believe that we almost weren't considering this? I'm so glad he told me how he really felt and that he really wanted the transfer. It's nice also that his manager is giving him preference to hours and location, because he knows that we are about to have the baby. I am not worried about Brian being home less. If it ends up that I need a little extra help at home, he can easily rearrange his schedule.

It's so funny how we tried to plan things out. We were wanting to move up north so badly this next year because we would be closer to my family and have more help with the baby... but we get an opportunity like this and we just seize it. We are definitely learning to deal with "come what may" because there really is no sense in planning it out... it just gets confusing and frustrating. All we can do is our best and take opportunities as they present themselves. Which seems to be working out very well for us so far.

After all, we weren't planning on becoming a family this year. We weren't planning on staying here another year at least either... but I am so glad that our plans fell through!

Bed Rest and Broomsticks

Day 2 of bed rest for me. Despite how naturally lazy I am, this is getting very boring and tedious. The only thing that helps is having an iPad to play games on and browse the net. As well as blog. As you will notice the iPad formats my blog a little differently. Plus my belly is so big I can balance the device on it and type lol! Right now it's about 3 pm which is the baby's active time so he is kicking me and the iPad is dancing on my stomach. Incredibly cute. Brian got a kick out of it. Why is it the second we are not allowed to do something it's all we want to do? I want to walk around. Every time I do that though I get contractions. Not really strong ones but uncomfortable enough to be noticed. At the store for an hour yesterday and had two. yesterday I had a little cramping as well.ugh but tomorrow he is considered full term. No doctor appointment til Monday though. Lots of inquiries from family and friends but I promise you all you will know when the time comes. Like I keep anything secret hahaha there are other indications that change is coming nothing to signal the on set of labor though. No water breaking. Able to talk through the few contractions I have. Baby hasn't dropped. But changes are there. I have a little bit of "show" which is nice medical talk for an irritated cervix. Its irritated because it's changing. I'm irritated by change as well so I understand lol my tummy hips lower back and breasts are all super tender. It's an interesting sensation but not one I care for. Tonight is Brian's long night a work and I've been pretty much forbidden to do anything unsupervised. I actually had to shower WITH the door open today. Lol. He really wants me to have the baby but at the same time he's determined that I heed orders and stay.in.bed!!! Lol Time for the first coma of the day.

Preparations: Stocked Up

We went to the store tonight. I had one goal in mind: stock up! Stock up on everything that I will need to feed my husband and myself for a while.

This week, my store seemed to heed my prayers because EVERYTHING frozen was on sale. A lot of what wasn't frozen was still on sale and at a stupid retarded low low price of ....

$0.99

Yes.

No 10/$10 mix and match nonsense.

Just a shit ton of items on sale for $0.99

I love that they put the weekly circular on the website. I love that you can create a shopping list online. I love that you can print it off, and it will GIVE YOU THE PRICE so there is no reason you should go over... unless you buy shit that's not on your list, then of course you will go over.

It doesn't take into account tax, but if you are buying all/mostly food/essentials then there isn't any tax.

Anyway. I saw that this week frozen breakfasts in particular were on sale. So was everything Stouffer's (that included Lean Cuisine as well).

Here's what I loaded up on:

Frozen juice from concentrate (.99)
Aunt Jemima frozen breakfasts (.99) - I got pancakes with sausage links
Homestyle frozen waffles ($3.50) this was a huge 24 count box.
Cereal
Milk
Cheese
Stouffer's french bread pizzas (5/$10)
Hot pockets (5/$10)
Tyson crispy chicken strips
Tyson grilled chicken strips
Lifesavers hard candies + Dum Dum lollipops (for the hospital)
Granola bars (for Brian at the hospital)
Lunch meat
English muffins
Marie Callendar's frozen entrees for Brian.

We spent $68 and saved $20 just by buying things that were on sale. Our weekly budget is about $75 so we did really good!

Our freezer is jam packed full of goodies. I still need to tackle the pantry next. I've got enough frozen meatballs + spaghetti noodles + sauce to make 4 batches. I also want to pick up some more mac and cheese, Alfredo sauce, soups, instant potatoes, instant rice, frozen chicken breasts, canned tuna, bread, and frozen veggies. Basically I want to get all the items I need for quick meals such as spaghetti, chicken alfredo, chicken salad, tuna salad, tuna noodle casserole, baked chicken. I also need to stock up on some toilet paper and dog food.

I might use Amazon for the toilet paper and dog food. They have a subscribe and save feature where you can buy items and have them shipped every x amount of days to your house for free. If it's baby items, I save 30% (on diapers, wipes, etc) if it's anything else, it's 15% at least.

Imagine never having to run out for toilet paper or dog food or laundry detergent. How cool. Have I mentioned I love the internet yet? Yay for internet!

Reality Check

Yesterday I was so filled with First World Problem Drama. I was complaining that I had to go to the hospital to check out my PRE TERM LABOR to make sure that the baby was safe.

I was complaining that I was in observation for a few hours to make sure that both me and the baby were safe and that, if I did end up going into active labor, it wouldn't cause the baby too much stress.

Drake's heartbeat is the strongest it's ever been. And incredibly steady. I have a very healthy, active baby. I am a very low risk pregnancy. Well, a little higher now that I have been deemed at risk for preterm labor... but in 2 short days that label will disappear. Drake will be considered full term on Thursday.

Sometimes its really hard to see the forest for the trees, and yesterday was no exception. Here I was, scared, nervous and excited that our little twosome was about to grow to three.... and nothing. Nothing happened. No progression. Sent home and told to "take it easy."

What does that even mean?

As I lay in bed in the early hours of the morning today, listening to the dog and Brian snore in concert, I realized I was selfish. Selfish for being upset that I didn't get to have a baby yesterday. Sure, real emotions and real emotions that I felt. But when I think about how lucky I am... well then I feel a little guilty. I mean, 200 years ago, women didn't have a whole lot of medical help when it came to birthing babies. Men weren't allowed to be in the room, except for the doctor. Women often died in childbirth.

I'm very lucky.

That being said, I can still be a little miffed about my circumstances. I'm not letting them get to me any more though. I am doing my best to make sure that Drake gets all the extra time he needs, if he so chooses he needs extra time.

Taking it easy... haha. I am a very sedentary person by nature so that makes me laugh that I am told to take it easy. How much easier could I possibly take it? I'm practically home bound! I guess the next step is bed rest... so that's what I've been doing today.

Laying in bed. Only getting up long enough to feed myself and to go to the bathroom. Otherwise, most of my day has been spent laying in bed sleeping, or playing on the iPad.

I've had ONE contraction since coming home. It was really faint though- about half the strength I was getting them. It came 700 minutes after the last one lol (over 11 hours). Early labor is one of those tricky things- it can last for a few hours or a few days. It can start up, stop, and then start up again a few days later. Talk about being the ultimate "waiting game".  The baby has been dancing up a storm though. Wiggling about doing somersaults.

It was a humbling day too, Brian having to tell everyone at his work that we didn't have the baby; me telling friends and family the same thing.

But soon! Soon we will have that awesome phone call and that little baby in our arms. Patience never was one of my strengths. Alright, I've been vertical long enough today, back to bed.

Better

I'm feeling a little better now. It was a really draining day emotionally, but I am so glad it's over and done with.

I'm still not happy that I had to spend the day in the hospital, but I am thankful that my doctor was wise enough to wait and see if I progressed or not.

One of the nurses wanted to give me pills to stop my contractions. Another nurse was encouraging me to help stimulate labor. My doctor apparently just became a new dad this week, which explains why he was out of the office this week and why it took so long to get through to him.

One cool thing about the hospital was the fetal heart rate monitor. How neat is technology that we can just slap a band on the belly to track the baby's movements and heart rate? I kept getting praises from the nurses. What a healthy and active baby you have! Wow he's a mover and a shaker!

I was wondering if I would end up getting a pelvic exam at my next appointment, since I will be 37 weeks and 4 days along. I think my question was answered today though, when I went in and was 1 cm dilated.

I'm pretty sure I'm going to be checked now.

It's okay to feel sad about being in early labor and not progressing. If I had made any changes I would have been induced and in for a very long few days at the hospital. At least now I can run around and have a little fun, getting my nails done on Thursday and a hair cut.

Provided I don't go into active labor between now and then.

I am still in code yellow. I can go at ANY TIME. Now, tomorrow, or 23 days from now. I am prepared as much as I can be, now I just have to prepare mentally.

Weeeee babies!

Any cool iPad/iPhone apps that are free? I want to load up on them.

Bummed

Started having contractions early this morning. They were coming 45 minutes apart and lasting about a minute to a minute and a half each.

I started timing them mostly to try out the contraction timer on my iPad app... but then I noticed the pattern. I finally fell asleep at 7 am this morning. Woke up at 10:30 to another contraction, lasting about a minute and a half. The next one came at noon- 90 minutes apart. Then we went to lunch and I had cheese fries and a milk shake. I had two more contractions and finally called the dr.

I fully expected the "call us when they are 5 minutes apart" lecture

Instead I got the "come to L&D and we will check you out" lecture.

I get there and I am attached to all the monitors, in the beautiful gown, and a nurse is practically fisting me to check my cervix. I was dilated to 1 cm.

The doctor was going to do one of two things. Either he was going to keep me for observation or he was going to give me some pills to stop the contractions.

One call to the doctor and a 20 minute wait later, I was told that I was to stay for observation for 3 hours to see if there was any change in dilation. The doctor said because I was 36 weeks and 4 days I could go either way. If there was change in dilation, I would be induced. If there wasn't any, then I would go home.

3 and a half hours later... there was no change.

I was sent home.

But I got ice cream while I waited.

So that was cool.

Still I am a little bummed.

Dr's orders are to take it easy and "not to press the issue" but keep tracking the contractions and if they get to the point where I can't talk through them to head back to L&D.

Brian said on the way home that it didn't feel right to leave the hospital without a baby and he was really upset that our carseat was going to be empty.

It started snowing on the way home.

A huge part of me is sad. A little heart broken. A little angry and frustrated that I had to wait 4 hours to be told to go home.... but another part of me is excited. I'm getting close. I'm glad that I am aware of what's going on. Every one keeps saying that its more time for the baby to grow and be healthy... which is cool.

The nurse told me that I was in early labor. And probably a little longer than I should be

Out of Steam

Well, I'm officially out of the nesting phase. I am back to my regular self again. Avoiding chores like the plague.

This Thursday was supposed to be my Week 37 check up but my doctor isn't in that day, and I guess they were all booked up Friday, because now my appointment will be Monday, December 12th at 9:30 in the morning. Greeeeeeat. I will be 37 weeks and 4 days. Does that mean I'd have to go back in for the 15th? Two appointments in one week? Or now will I be late perpetually? Will I be given my pelvic at 37.5 weeks and then just skip the 38th week and wait until 39? Can I please just go into labor now so I don't have to think about it?

Since I don't have a doctors appointment on the 8th, I am going to get my hair cut instead. I want my layers evened out and a few inches cut off. I think I'll get a mani/pedi too. Sounds like a good idea to me! I'll have Brian call his aunt's salon for me tomorrow to make an appointment for at least one of those things.

I'm trying to cope with the false labor. I keep panicking. Is this a real contraction? No. Okay. Well... alright then. Is this a real one? Hmmm... No. okay. The baby hasn't dropped. I have passed any plugs or had my water break, and my contractions are sporadic at best. Not that any of that means anything; the baby doesn't always drop before labor begins, the plug and water don't always break, and the false contractions could be real contractions, just a little lame. It does all add up to one thing though:

I'm stuck being pregnant for now.

The baby moves so much it is hard to focus on anything else. He presses down against me and it suddenly feels like I have to pee now! I think I spend more time in the bathroom than anything else these days. I crave lots of water. My feet are so swollen they are actually round. I drink so much water that I expect it to start oozing out of my feet. I crave sweets all the time. I can't decide if I want cookies, brownies, or milkshakes. Or a combo of all three. So far, Brian's not given in to my demands whims. I think a cookie dough, brownie bite, peppermint shake sounds delicious. He looks at me like I've grown a second head.

Which I have. In my belly. So give me milkshakes now please. No such luck. Sigh.

Back to crocheting. Something to get my mind off of the nothing that is happening.

Decisions

A new store is opening up just down the road from us. Brian's store manager was offered the position to take over the new store and he asked Brian if he wanted to transfer over.

Brian's going to take the transfer. It will mean that we won't be able to move... but the more we think about it, the more we want to stay. Maybe not in this apartment complex forever... Fort Wayne feels like home now.

The new store comes with a host of benefits. Shorter commute. Closer to home. Large delivery area. Primarily to businesses. Seems people are always more generous with company cash than they are with their own ;) The residential area is a little ritzy too. There's an apartment complex in the area that the rents are about double what we pay here.

There's no guarantee that we will find a house to live in come March when our lease is up here. We aren't moving to another apartment. I'd rather stay here until I could afford a down payment for a mortgage. Brian feels the same. We like the management here and our neighbors don't bother us. The only reasons we really wanted a house was so we could have a yard for the dog, and a little extra cash to help pay down our debt. But if we use our tax return to pay off my car, we will be able to free up an extra $230 a month. ($190 for the car payment, and my insurance would be cut in half!)

I can't really see a downside other than not being able to move. Is it really a downside? hmm...

Anyway, Brian's got to work today and is going to put in for his transfer. It will be an exciting new chapter. There is always the option to transfer back or to another store, should we decide to go ahead and move anyway. So really... is there any risk? Mmm... a little. But that's half the fun :)

Progress

Remember how I wanted to get that scarf done for Brian? I started joking to my friends and family that I was working on one for him for winter.... next year because it was taking so long. Stupid popcorn stitch.

The hard part isn't the popcorns. It's working the back side, which is straight single crochet. Except for a while there I was dropping stitches. Each row is supposed to have 23 single crochet, so the front can have 7 popcorn with 2 single crochet in between each popcorn. A lot of ripping out and starting over. A lot of undone rows and curses to the heavens.

But I am finally making progress. I finally got it in my head to count the freakin' stitches and what do you know? It starts turning out like it's supposed to.

This isn't a "mindless" pattern. It's not something I can watch a movie while doing and end up looking great or even. It's one I really have to focus on. For that reason it is both a great pattern and a terrible pattern for me. Great because it's actually challenging to keep focused. Terrible because it's actually challenging to keep focused.

It's so long now that it's getting heavy to hold up as I work on it. It takes up over half of my desk as I work on it. My skein of yarn is getting squishy as the yarn is pulled out and its starting to collapse in on itself. I'd say I'm about 70% done with the scarf. About 40% of my second skein of yarn is gone. I may get it done in time for the baby to be born. I'm really booking it. I worked on it for 4 hours yesterday and another 2 so far today.

I also took some pictures. Because I needed to update my project page on Ravelry.

The pictures were hard to take... my belly kept getting in the way lol! But I am so happy to be getting this done with. I didn't have any trouble changing yarns like I usually do. I even got the ends to weave in unnoticed so I must be getting better.

Plus the yarn feels so soft. It's only part wool, but it feels just like it. So comfy. I think I found my new favorite yarn. Good thing it comes in like 40 thousand colors.

Next update will be the finished result. Hopefully which will be this week. I am going to try and get it done before Monday, as I have most of Sunday off.

Hospital Bag Edition

Here's what I got for me and Brian-

* Travel sized toothbrush and tooth paste. 

* Trial deodorants. Brian got my favorite- the Axe Dark Temptations (smells like chocolate). Maybe he thinks I won't want to kill him in the delivery room if he smells like chocolate.

* Shampoo Conditioner because I can't read. (I picked some shampoo up the next day) 

* For me, Maxi pads. These are staying at home. Unfortunately, a huge necessity. And a pain in the ass to find. Did you know that I couldn't find these maximum absorption ones to save my life? All the brands they had on the shelf were for "light flow days" like wtf. But I found these stuffed in the back of a shelf with some dust on them. I will give them purpose.

* Heating pad. Although I'm not really sure I will need one, but it never hurts to be prepared.
* Lansinoh lanolin cream. This bad boy was $10 for less than 1.5 ounce tube... but you really do not need much at all. And it totally helps! A small pea sized amount is all I need and I only need it once a day. I went from cracked, bleeding, sore breasts to just sore in about 3 days.
* A night gown. It's a size 2x from Wal-Mart- but it fits me perfectly and with the baby bump it actually hits about mid-calf. It's perfect. Big, loose sleeves. Zipper from top to bottom. POCKETS. I'm a little bummed about a 2x but I'm not going to get hung up on it. In fact, I want another in blue. This one is pink.

Here's what I got for the baby- 

* A going home outfit, complete with matching hat. 

* A heavy receiving blanket to wrap him up in on the way home
* The baby book. I already filled out some of it- like the "How Mommy and Daddy felt when they found out" and "What Mommy and Daddy got at the baby shower"
* Baby booties from the baby shower cake. I can't wait to write his name, date, weight and length on them. I am so excited! 

I love the little extra padded knee area. Brian said its to clean our floors. Hahaha

Airplane! Vroom!

He's already a pro. 

It's not a bi plane... its a butt plane! hahaha

Aww the hat

Yes a matching blanket too! Yay!! 

Just look at how cute this baby outfit is! It makes me squeal and go AWWWWWWWWWWW every single time I see it. It's a 0-3 Months so I can't wait to put the little bugger in it! :>)

Is there anything else I need to pack? Besides clothes for me and Brian?

Ps That rocking chair is soooo comfortable. I sit in it for like an hour each day just because I can!